I thought Dad’s blood would smell of him, that soft citrus scent I’ve known all my life. But all I can smell on my hands are bitter pennies.
I look down at his face. He’s so white, so quiet.
Is this really happening?
‘Quick, get up!’ A hand grabs at my shoulder, trying to pull me up. ‘Mum’ll be here soon.’
I think of Mum’s reassuring smell. Peach perfume. Sometimes sweat. Chocolate on her breath. I want to squash my face into her neck and tell her everything that’s happened, every little detail. Then I want her to tell me it’ll all be okay, that she understands, that she will always understand, for ever and ever.
But I can’t tell her the truth. I have to be strong. We have to be strong.
‘Drop the knife,’ a voice hisses.
I look down at the large knife that’s in my hands. God, I didn’t even realise I was still holding it. Only this morning, Mum was using this knife to slice a grapefruit in half. I see the remains of the grapefruit on the side, probably already rotting.
I do as I’m told and the knife clatters to the ground, specks of Dad’s blood spotting the kitchen walls as it lands.
The same walls Dad spent all of his birthday weekend painting.
The bitter stench of his blood invades my nostrils again and I’m folding right over, a silent scream coming out.
‘What have I done?’ I say over and over as I stare at my dad.
A finger is put to my mouth. ‘Shhh. Count to five.’
Outside, a bird sings. It sounds all shrill and panicked. Must be a goldfinch. Mum pointed one out to me once. It was in Joel’s tree, high up, its little red face staring down at me. Mum said Grandma Quail used to tell her people’s souls live on in animals and I remember hoping it was Joel watching us.
Now I hope it isn’t. I wouldn’t want him to see what I just did.
The clock ticks and the three of us stand around Dad, his blood congealing beneath the soles of our feet as we wait for the sound of Mum’s key in the lock . . .
Chapter Two
Thursday 18th April, 2019
4.07 p.m.
Welcome to Forest Grove, Utopia of the Woods
Home to Strong Branches and Deep Roots
Melissa cycled past the village’s welcome sign and into the forest, the wheels of her mountain bike juddering over the sludge of leaves and knot of fallen branches. She liked the forest after a downpour, the squish of the damp leaves beneath her wheels, the smell of the mulch and drenched wood drifting up to her. The sun was now scorching those leaves, though, revenge for the shock of rain earlier, and it was warm again.
Prime barbecue weather, Melissa thought to herself as she smiled up at the sun.
She intended to begin the long Easter weekend by kicking back in the garden with a glass of home-made cider in one hand, a barbecued (and heavily buttered) corn on the cob in the other. Screw the diet! In fact, maybe they could invite Daphne and Maddy over, even get Patrick’s parents to join them all? Make a night of it.
After, she and Patrick could stay out in the dark and talk all evening like they used to. Patrick needed some chill time. He was running to be a parish councillor and with the local elections coming up in May, combined with his job as a director of a marketing company, he seemed more stressed than usual.
Yep, a few ciders in the evening sun would do the trick!
In fact, they might even have something to celebrate if things had gone well for their elder twin, Lilly (elder by five minutes, as she loved to tell people, not wanting anyone to forget she came out before her twin brother, Lewis). Today was the day she’d be finding out if she’d got the lead role in Forest Grove’s annual ‘Musical in the Woods’ production, this year The Sound of Music.
It meant a lot to Lilly, nights spent whispering lines to herself over and over, mornings spent scrutinising her expression in the mirror to ensure she was projecting just enough Maria von Trapp without sacrificing the modern take she was giving the role. They were all hoping against hope that all those drama lessons Patrick bought for Lilly after she lost out on the lead the year before hadn’t gone to waste. Whatever happened, though, Melissa would be proud of her daughter for