A Walk Along the Beach by Debbie Macomber Page 0,97
knowing how badly I failed you.”
Being unnecessarily cruel to Sean or anyone went against my nature. “I appreciate what you’re saying; I know you’re sincere and I wish things could be different for us, I really do. It would be easy to love you, but I can’t let that happen.”
“Why? Because I wasn’t with you when Harper was sick?”
“No,” I said, keeping the emotion out of my voice, although it was difficult. “It isn’t only that you were gone when my life was falling apart. It’s because I know I will never be able to count on you. You’re married to your career.
“You are who you are,” I continued, “and I won’t ask you to change. Your work is your life, your mistress. You love it and the risks that go along with it. In the short time I’ve known you, think about all the chances you’ve taken. Our relationship isn’t working for me. I’m sorry, I truly am.”
“But—”
“It would be best if we didn’t see each other again, Sean. I wish it could be different.”
I could see Sean struggling, wanting to argue. He opened his mouth, but when he saw the determined look in my eyes, he closed it again.
Knowing this would likely be the last time I’d see him outside of Bean There or around town, I leaned forward and kissed his cheek. “Thank you,” I said, and moved back one step.
He continued to stare at me as I headed for the front door. I was on my way out when he stopped me.
“Willa,” he said with a tenderness I didn’t expect, “don’t make the mistake of turning away from love. We have our differences, but we can work past them if you’ll give me another chance.”
I hesitated and then sadly shook my head. After burying my sister, I couldn’t face losing someone else I loved. Making an emotional investment in Sean was too much for me.
As if reading my mind, he added, “Loving someone, anyone, including me, will always involve some risk. I love you. I have almost from the first moment we met. It’s crazy how long it took me to work up the courage to tell you.
“You shook my world. You still do. One day, and I pray it will be soon, you’ll realize that love is worth the cost. Otherwise, I fear you’ll end up alone and bitter, thinking about all that you missed out on in life.”
“That’s my choice,” I reminded him.
“It is,” he said, walking me to the door. “Choose wisely, my love.”
Stepping out into the wind and rain, a chill came over me. Ignoring it, I walked to where I’d left my car, the harsh weather beating down against me.
* * *
—
I connected with Shirley, who I’d spoken to only briefly since I’d moved back into town. I told her I planned to open again on Thursday morning. It would take that long to complete an inventory and purchase what I’d need to get back up and running. I would serve only what I could order in quickly or bake myself. The coffee beans had to be freshly roasted and of the highest quality. No one brewed a better cup of java than Bean There, and I was determined it would stay that way.
As soon as Shirley learned I was opening my doors once again, she stopped by the shop. “Thank the good Lord,” she squealed, hugging me hard enough to crack a rib.
I’d been convinced I’d worked her to the point that she wouldn’t want to return. “You’re willing to come back?”
“You couldn’t keep me away,” she said, squeezing me again. “If I ever threaten to quit or retire, remind me what it’s like at home.”
Grinning, I knew she wanted me to ask. “What’s so bad about being at home?”
“It’s Randy.” She tossed her hand into the air. “He expects me to be his personal maid. Cook his breakfast, fix his lunch. Are his clothes washed? I swear, what do I look like? His servant?”
I struggled to hide a smile, knowing Randy well. He had recently retired from work with the city.
“He wants me to bake day and night, and not just for him,” she continued. “He promised his poker buddies that I’d provide homemade goodies every week. You’d think I had nothing better to do than see to his every wish.”
“I’ll be glad to have you back,” I said, grateful she was inclined to return.
“I never appreciated the fact that this job saved my marriage.”