Waiting For It - Allyson Lindt Page 0,45

is fucking incredible, baby doll,” Luke murmured against the back of my neck.

God, I just wanted to live in this bliss forever.

And ignore that teensy nagging insistence that I could never have this again.

Chapter Twenty-Two

A girl could get addicted to waking up sandwiched between two men. But as consciousness rushed in, so did the reminder that this ended today. Especially when Chase extracted himself to shower. He had an early flight out. Luke and I would spend a few hours in the office before we left.

Luke dragged a finger over my lower lip, as he lay next to me in bed. “What’s with the pout?”

“I’m going to miss this.”

“It doesn’t have to end.”

But it did. The realization I had yesterday, when I was talking to Sadie, wouldn’t leave me alone. “Not talking to you two sucked. This has been fun and incredible and a whole huge list of adjectives, but that just means the longer we drag things out, the worse it hurts when things don’t work out next time.”

“What makes you think that’s what’s going to happen?” Luke asked.

“It might, it might not. But odds are higher on the might side.” I hated the reality of that. “With Lyn, we made friendship work after. I need that from the two of you—your friendship.”

“You have it. Always.” Luke brushed his lips over my forehead, then pressed his forehead to mine. “I’m going on record as saying I want more, but I understand why you’re holding back. I’m here if you change your mind.”

I nodded, and pulled away before I could sink into the comfort and lose my resolve. I sat with my back to Luke and hugged my knees to my chest.

Silence settled between us. When the shower shut off, the bed bounced from Luke getting up. “Do you want to go first?”

I shook my head. I needed more time to collect myself. That seemed to be my mood of the week.

“I won’t be long. Then you can hop in.” Luke grabbed clothes from his bag and headed into the bathroom as soon as Chase stepped out.

Chase studied me when he entered the room. “You okay?”

“Just gathering my thoughts. Telling myself I can do with you what I did with Lyn.”

He frowned. “I don’t think Lyn loves you the same way I do.”

My breath caught at the confession. The declaration. “Chase, I can’t—”

“It’s okay.” He crouched in front of me and cradled my cheek. He traced his thumb along my skin. “I’m not trying to guilt or force you into anything. I’m here for you, however you need. I always will be.” Chase’s sincerity ached more than if he’d laughed the whole thing off.

“I know.” And I did. Even when we were fighting, part of me always knew I had him.

He pressed his lips to my forehead, and my heart clenched. “I have a plane to catch. I’ll see you back home.”

I nodded, not trusting anything that might come out of my mouth.

LUKE AND I WRAPPED up at the office. There wasn’t much to do, besides tell the team they were awesome and to keep up the good work.

We headed to the airport and boarded our plane without issue. Our seats were next to each other this time.

I settled into the window seat, and Luke took the spot next to me. One of my least favorite things about flying was figuring out where to put my arms so I didn’t bump into rowmates, but I liked the connection that danced between us when his forearm rested against mine.

We didn’t say anything as the plane taxied. I was becoming a master at ignoring anything uncomfortable about silence with Luke, but that didn’t mean I liked it. The dip in my gut as we left the ground was now tied to the memory of the first time Chase kissed me. I was going to call it ButterfliesPlus. I should trademark that.

“You thinking about the flight in?” There was no accusation in Luke’s question.

I should tell him to please kindly step the fuck out of my head, but I didn’t mind that he knew me well enough to ask. “I’ll probably never fly again without thinking about that, even if it did turn out to be a mistake.” The last bit felt obligatory, but it also didn’t feel true.

“Do you really believe that?”

Not even close. I wanted to. Logically, keeping Chase and Luke at arm’s length was the best way to avoid all-around heartbreak. It was also the best way to avoid any