Velvet Midnight - Max Walker Page 0,34

dark period in my life. I know you can overcome this.”

I shook my head and looked up at the cloudless blue sky. “I don’t know, I’m not seeing a way out of this.”

“Do you think you’re depressed?” my brother asked, point-blank.

It took me a little by surprise. Such a simple, basic question. One I had already known the answer to for months, maybe even years. Still, I never vocalized it. Not even to myself.

I gave a silent nod before realizing he couldn’t see. “Yes,” I said, simultaneously feeling a pressure lifting from my chest and another settling on my shoulders.

“And that’s okay,” Dusty quickly replied. “It’s okay to be depressed, but it’s also important to not let it control you. Don’t let the depression become you.”

From somewhere inside the house, Penelope started to bark. My moms must have gotten home.

“I’m trying,” I said, the defeat clear in my voice. “I just don’t know what to do.”

“Take it tiny step by tiny step. Focus on starting a routine again. Set an alarm, wake up early, and stick to a plan. Have you been working out? Playing any sports?”

“No, not at all. I started to run again, but I’m not sure how long it’ll last.”

“That’s still a good step in the right direction. I think the next step would be reaching out to a professional. Have you talked to any doctors?”

I shook my head, the fear instantly spiking inside me. “I hate doctors, Dust.”

“I know you do, but this is important. If someone has a tumor, they don’t just put it off because they hate doctors. They go in and get it checked. It works the same for our brains.”

“Says the walking brain.”

Dusty tsked. “I’m serious. I want you to at least talk to a therapist. You don’t have to go see a doctor, but you should at least go to therapy.”

“I don’t know,” I replied.

“Please, Benji.”

“All right, fine,” I said. “I’ll think about it.”

I could tell my brother wanted a solid “yes,” but I just couldn’t give it to him. I wasn’t in the mental state to even think about opening up to a stranger, no matter if they were paid and had some fancy degrees hanging up on their walls. I didn’t see it helping. All I saw was the blank, empty expanse of the depression, drifting around my head like a low-hanging cloud bank.

The sliding glass door opened and Penelope ran out, chasing a red ball. Milo, the Aussie, ran behind her, wagging his tail, which was being targeted by a lively Tammy.

The trio ran past me, kicking up a trail of dust. Then, through the glass doors, out walked Rex, holding a brown paper bag that looked like it was a napkin away from bursting.

“Dust, I’ll call you back,” I said, hoping I could dodge this upcoming encounter and lock myself in my room.

“Call me if anything, all right, Benj? And please, please consider what we talked about. I think it would really help.”

“I will.”

“Love you.”

I smiled, feeling better after having talked with my brother. Maybe that was all I needed. Maybe this depression would be lifted after a few more chats with my twin. “Love you, too, Dust. Tell Brandon I say ’sup.”

“I’ll tell him you said ‘hey, girl, heyyyy.’”

With a chuckle, I pocketed my phone and tried to keep the smile on as Rex got closer.

“Benj, there you are.” Rex lifted his hand to wave. The bag he had around his wrist rose into the air, loudly tearing in half, sending a variety of different vegetables falling to the ground.

“Ah, fuck,” Rex said, his expression falling as fast as the vegetables.

14

Rex Madison

Six Years Ago

“Ah, fuck,” I said, watching the shiny red apple fall into the grass. A capuchin monkey—Sammy was her name—came running from the tree she had been watching me in. She grabbed the apple in her hands and took a crunchy bite, looking at me as she rolled it around, taking another bite of it before turning and running back into the tree.

“She stole my wallet earlier,” Benji said, coming up behind me and surprising me.

“Did you get it back?”

“No, and I’ve got a thousand-dollar order of bananas I have to cancel now.”

That made me forget all about the stolen apple. We laughed as we took a seat on the bench, underneath a tree that had four capuchin monkeys swinging from the branches.

We’d been at the primate sanctuary for about a week now, and the trip was already coming to an end. I hated