Until Autumn - Sheridan Anne Page 0,36

with it.

I grab the door handle and push my way through to the on-call room to find Autumn sitting cross-legged on the bed with her face buried in her hands. My heart shatters. It’s one thing seeing her confused and upset before storming out of a room, but to see her misery and tears caused by my actions is something I never want to witness again.

She doesn’t glance up, but I know she senses me here, so I don’t bother clearing my throat or making any sounds to announce myself. I simply walk across the room and drop down on the bed beside her, keeping far enough away that I can’t just reach out and touch her.

“The words ‘go away’ aren’t in your vocabulary?” she grumbles, not bothering to look up.

A grin pulls at my lips, but I reel it back in, not wanting to make a joke of this moment. “To be honest, it’s really not a phrase that I’ve heard since I was seventeen and tormenting my little sister about her first high school boyfriend.”

“You’re a dick.”

I take a breath and look up at her, watching the way her silent tears track down her face. “I’m sorry,” I whisper. “It killed me to dismiss you like that, but I had to. You made an error, one that never would have happened had you been prepared, and so I did what any other doctor would have done to their student.”

Those big hazel eyes flash up to mine and pull at everything within my chest. “But that’s just the thing. I don’t understand. Help me out here, because I’m clearly missing something. What error? I did everything by the book. It was a perfect delivery.”

“Technically, you’re right. It was perfect and you did an incredible job.”

“So, what then?”

“The couple standing beside Rebecca were the adoptive parents of those twins, and when you—”

Autumn sucks in a deep gasp, her hand flying to her mouth as she straightens on the bed, her back stiffening like a wooden board. Her eyes somehow fill quicker with tears as she gapes at me in horror. “I robbed that woman of the first hold of her son.”

My hand flinches at my side, and I use every little bit of will power that I have to stop myself from pulling her into my chest and holding her until the tears are gone. “It’s okay,” I tell her, pressing my lips into a tight line. “The adoptive mother came and spoke to me, and she said not to worry. This is her fifth and sixth baby, so she’s not put out, but had that been anyone else; perhaps a first-time mother who had been waiting her whole life for that very moment … Look, all I’m saying is that in the future, you need to be better prepared for situations like this.”

Autumn wipes the tears off her face and takes a few slow, calming breaths. “I promise,” she tells me, fighting the need to break down again. “I will never fuck up like this again. I want to be the best. I swear, I would never intentionally go out and try to hurt someone like that. I … I …”

Fuck it.

I reach out and grab her, curling my hands around her toned waist and pulling her into my lap. She instantly falls into me, straddling my lap and allowing me to crush her against my chest and hold her as she cries. “I’m sorry,” I murmur as I feel her tears on my neck and her soft hair brushing against my cheek. My hand roams up and down her back and despite her misery, I’ve never felt so content.

“You didn’t do anything wrong,” she tells me over the lump in her throat. “You had to send me away. It was the right thing to do. I can’t be getting special treatment just because …”

She cuts herself off as my hands pause on her back. “Just because of what, Autumn?” I prompt, gently pulling back.

Autumn straightens and pulls her face out from the curve of my neck. She meets my eyes before wiping her hands over her own. “Don’t act like you don’t know,” she murmurs, her heart on her sleeve. “Something is going on between us and I know you feel it just like I do.”

I reach up and curl my hand around the back of her neck, my thumb lazily resting along the curve of her jaw. “You and I …” I start. “No matter how I