Unraveling (Second Chances) - By Micalea Smeltzer Page 0,12
there.
“Katy, please come back inside,” Sharon said.
Another sob wracked my body.
“Sweetie,” she tapped again.
I was frozen.
She opened the door and I fell into her arms.
“Katy,” she said, soothingly, “It’s okay to cry about it. It’s okay to be angry. You’re only hurting yourself by holding it in.” Her fingers smoothed through my hair.
“I just don’t want to remember! I don’t want to feel!” I cried.
“Katy,” she lightly pushed my shoulders back so she could look in my eyes. “You know that isn’t possible. You can’t undo what’s already done. I wish that wasn’t true, but it is.” She pushed my hair back off my forehead, like I was a child that had fallen off her bike and she was checking for scrapes and bruises. “Please, let me help you,” she said.
I nodded.
“Are you ready to come back inside?”
I extracted myself from her arms and wiped my face. “Yeah.” My voice wasn’t as shaky as I thought it would be.
“Good,” she said, and guided me back inside the building.
~***~
“So,” Rollo said, taking a bite of pizza, as we sat on the floor in front of the coffee table, “how did it go with Sharon today?”
I picked a piece of pepperoni off the pizza, just to avoid Rollo’s watchful eyes. “It was…” I knew I couldn’t lie to Rollo. With a sigh, I admitted, “I kind of had a breakdown.”
“Well, I wish it was a breakthrough, not a breakdown, but do you think it helped?” Rollo asked.
“No, you’re not,” Rollo took a sip of Diet Pepsi. “No one is hopeless.”
“I’m broken, then.”
Rollo laughed. “Katy, you’re a lot of things but broken is definitely not one of them. Neither is weak,” he said, when I started to open my mouth. “You’re the strongest person I know. True, you’ve got your quirks but they do not make you weak. They’re how you’ve coped.”
A tear slipped out of the corner of my eye. “It’s been two years, Rollo. Some days, I feel like I’m worse now, than just after it happened.”
“No, baby cakes, you’re better every day, especially recently. I think, at least I hope, you’re starting to realize that not everyone is like Preston. Most people are actually decent.” He grabbed another slice of pizza.
“I feel like…” I took a deep breath and braced myself to say the word. “I feel like, when he raped me, that some essential part of my soul was broken, and I don’t know if it can be put back together.”
“It can be put back together… but it will take time,” Rollo’s kind blue eyes met mine, there was a sadness there and I hated that it was because of me.
“When did you get so wise?” I chuckled, trying to lighten the somber mood.
“Puh-lease, I’ve always been wise. You just choose to ignore my insanely awesome wisdom,” he bumped my shoulder.
I flicked a piece of pepperoni at him. It landed on his shirt and he made a face of disgust.
“Ew! Katy! This is my favorite shirt!”
“Your, ‘I only look straight,’ shirt is your favorite? Really, Rollo?” I chuckled.
“What can I say? I like to let the ladies know that I’m off the market. I’m considerate like that,” he grinned, pulling at the tee.
I rolled my eyes. “I sometimes wonder why I’m friends with you.”
“Because I’m insanely awesome, funny, smart-” He rambled.
“Rollo, this is not Match.com, you do not need to list your best qualities to me. I’m very well acquainted with them, and your bad ones.”
“Oh please,” he flipped his curly blonde hair, “you know I have no bad qualities. I’m far too awesome for that.”
I laughed. I could always count on Rollo to make me feel better.
I leaned my head on his shoulder. “I don’t know what I would do without you, Rollo.”
“Sometimes, I don’t know either, baby cakes,” he said, solemnly.
A tear leaked out of the corner of my eye and I hastily wiped it away. “You’ve always been there for me, Rollo. I don’t say it enough, but thank you for being the best friend any girl could ever have.”
“I’m always here for you, Katy.”
“I know,” I whispered.
“And I always will be,” he kissed the top of my head.
7
“KATY, WE’RE GOING TO BE LATE IF YOU DON’T GET OUT OF THE CAR,” Rollo said slowly, like he was afraid I would run away.
I’d been sitting in my car for the last five minutes, debating whether or not to skip the stupid self-defense classes.