accepting Colby into my arms. He stared up at me with wide dark eyes. When I used my
finger to tickle his chest, he grabbed hold of it and held on tight. The more time I spent with the twins, the more
an aching need unfurled within me. I couldn’t ignore it anymore—I was broody. Charlie and I had briefly talked
about children, on a hypothetical level anyway. I wasn’t sure if he would ever want children of his own, let alone
with me, yet no matter how much I longed to hold another child of my own in my arms, my need for Charlie was
stronger.
“Hey,” Jesse said, sitting. His bodyguard had taken a seat at an adjacent table. “Colby looks content.”
I smiled. “I think he is.”
The barista brought our order across. His cheeks pinked as he handed Jesse his drink. “Sorry if it’s rude to ask,
but…could I…” He gulped. “Could I get your autograph?”
Jesse chuckled. “Sure.”
“You probably get fed up with this, don’t you?” the barista asked as he searched his pockets for something Jesse
could write on. In the end, he gave up and grabbed a napkin.
“Never,” Jesse said. “If you’ve got a phone on you, I’m happy to take a selfie with you.”
The barista’s eyes bugged. “Really?”
“Sure.”
I watched as they interacted. It was good to see Jesse so happy and animated. Isaac was right—Jesse did love
being a pop star. A year ago, I’d have been nursing jealousy as I watched him enjoying the limelight, but that
green mist wasn’t stirring within me. I pursed my lips.
“Are you okay?” Jesse asked as the barista went back to work.
“Yes. Just thinking.”
“About?”
“I think I’ve finally let go.”
Jesse’s brow crumpled. “Of what?”
“My anger at losing my career.” I stirred some sugar into my coffee. “I used to feel jealous whenever I watched
you interacting with fans.”
“Dad…”
I held up my hand. “Let me finish, please?”
Jesse nodded and leant his head against Isaac’s shoulder.
I jostled Colby in my arm and wiggled the finger he was holding. He tightened his tiny grasp and pulled my finger
to his lips as he made suckling motions.
“I think he’s hungry,” Isaac said. “Which probably means Jasper will be the moment he wakes up too. I’ll make a
couple of bottles.”
He started to get things out of the changing bag as I carried on talking.
“I was always so bitter. You had everything I’d ever wanted.”
“I thought you wanted me to follow in your footsteps?” Jesse asked.
“I did. I thought it would ease my resentment if you could have the success I’d lost…but it didn’t.” I hung my
head. “It only made it worse.”
Jesse reached across the table to squeeze my arm. “I’m sorry.”
“You apologise too much.”
Jesse tilted his head. “Funny, Charlie keeps saying that too.”
My breath caught in my throat. “Charlie?” I asked, trying to keep my voice even.
“Yeah. It’s a shame he can’t come to the twins’ adoption party. I wonder how his tour is going?”
Was Jesse trying to trip me up into revealing something? Charlie was en route to Copenhagen in Denmark. “I’ve
got no idea. Do you know what his schedule is?”
Jesse shook his head. “I derailed you. Sorry. Go on.”
I exhaled. If he had been testing me, hopefully, I’d passed. Now wasn’t the right time to tell my son I was in a
relationship with a guy only one year older than him. I closed my eyes, tracking the conversation back until I
could pick up my thread again.
“A year ago, watching you with fans would have made my bitterness worse. But today…just now…I realised I’m
not jealous anymore.”
“That’s great.” Jesse’s face lit up. “But what does that mean?”
I shrugged. “I don’t want that life anymore. I think I’m going to finally be able to let go of the past and start living
for the now.”
Colby squeezed my finger again as though congratulating me on my revelation. I smiled at him, even as tears
gathered in my eyes.
“But I need to apologise to you,” I said, looking at Jesse. “I pushed and pressured you into going into the music
industry. You must have had dreams of your own, and I didn’t ever ask you what they were. I never gave you any
other option but to live my dream for me.”
“It’s okay.”
“No, it’s not.”
“It is. I’m happy, Dad. I’ve got everything I ever wanted and more.”
“What did you want?”
“Honestly?”
I nodded.
“My only dream was for you to love me, and now I know you do. I enjoy what I do, and I
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