Two to Tangle (A Tangle Valley Romance #2) - Melissa Brayden Page 0,95
what I know.”
“What’s that?” Ryan asked.
“You’ve never seen the way she looks at you when you’re not watching.”
Ryan swallowed, absorbing this new information, clinging to it like a life jacket in deep waters. “I haven’t.”
“It’s amazing really.” Becca shook her head in wonder. “Like you were the very person responsible for hanging the moon that lights up the night. As if she just can’t quite believe you’re real.”
Ryan stared down at her hands. “God, I want that to be true. The only problem is that I’ve seen her look at someone else the exact same way.” She raised her gaze. “And I’m bad at this, Becca. It was one thing to put myself out there when I was first getting to know her. I could give of myself and be transparent and let her in, but the way I feel now? It’s so much more. My feelings for her could swallow me whole.” She shook her head ruefully. “I can’t do that. I can’t be that person, or I’ll drown.”
Becca tilted her head to the side and regarded Ryan with kind eyes. “I think you’re selling yourself entirely too short. Love is scary. I’m not going to argue that point.” She caught Becca gazing across the lawn at Joey, who was grabbed by one of the attendees in a handshake-cheek kiss combo. “And sometimes it doesn’t always go the way you want it to. Been there. But what I’ve found is that sticking it out through the hard times can be the most satisfying payoff imaginable. The two of you grow stronger for surviving the rough stuff.”
Ryan smiled at the idea. It sounded great in theory, and God, why shouldn’t she take this ride with Gabriella and see where they ended up? It might be the decision that changed her life forever. This moment right here. “Is that what it was like for you? Terrifying until it wasn’t?”
Becca’s eyes lit up. “Yes, I think that’s entirely accurate—maybe even more so for Joey, who’d been burned by love in the past.” Ryan ruminated on that one for a moment. She remembered when Simone left Joey on their wedding day. She hadn’t been in attendance, but the town had talked all about it for months. Looking at it through the lens she had now, the personal experience with real love, she couldn’t imagine that kind of hurt. Who invented this kind of vulnerability, and how could she find them and shake them? Hard. None of this felt fair. “I envy Joey. I don’t know how she found the courage to try again after that. I don’t know that I could have.”
“I think if what you have is worth it, there’s really no other choice.” Becca smiled. “Now I’m gonna get out of here and go support my girlfriend. Will I see you soon?”
Ryan took a deep breath and nodded. “Thanks for the pep talk. I needed it.”
“Anytime. And Ryan? I mean that. Don’t be a stranger.”
She felt her chest grow tight. “I won’t. Promise.”
She watched Becca, decked out in a navy maxi dress and looking like a million bucks, stroll casually to the party. But she belonged there at Joey’s side, and Ryan couldn’t say the same about herself at Gabriella’s, no matter how much she wanted to make that leap.
She fired up the ignition and pulled slowly out of the parking lot, leaving the vineyard, Gabriella, and the best parts of herself in her rearview mirror. The farther she got from Tangle Valley, the more powerful the emotion that descended. Her hands shook as she gripped the steering wheel, and hot tears that she was wholly unaccustomed to streamed fast down her cheeks. She choked on a sob, having never felt more defeated, alone, or helpless in her whole life.
* * *
The release party moved into its second and final hour. Wine flowed. Everyone laughed a little louder as a result. The sun began to fall, and the beautiful colors from its setting blanketed the gathering. Gabriella took in smiles, the fun everyone was having. She joined in, greeting the people she knew and introducing herself to those she did not. All the while, she longed for Ryan to hold her hand on this momentous occasion in her life. A day she’d always remember. She made sure to snap a few photographs to commemorate the event. She smiled next to Joey as a guest snapped their photo with the restaurant in the distance.
Moments later, she glimpsed a woman with dark hair,