Twelve Days The Beginning - By Jade Reyner Page 0,179

that she would be meeting Vaughn’s family for the first time ever in the sterile confines of a hospital and registered how utterly inappropriate that was. They would meet in a hospital; a hospital that even now they were rushing to because of what she had done to their son and brother. The feelings of guilt and responsibility were overwhelming and Elise knew that she would never forgive herself for this. Ever. Even if Vaughn survived... she shuddered. The alternative didn’t bear thinking about. He would survive, he had to survive.

A short while later Stephen reached into his pocket and pulled out an envelope. He looked at it hesitantly before he handed it to her. Their eyes met briefly and then he looked away, the pain in his eyes that she knew was reflected in hers, was raw.

“He left you a note, Elise” he said, his face crumpling and he scrubbed his hand across his eyes as if to try to focus. “Maybe that will give you your answers. Maybe it will give all of us some answers.”

Elise didn’t think it was possible to shake any more than she already was but the vibrations intensified as she looked down at the envelope in her hand. His elegant handwriting was scrawled across the front, one word – Elise. With trembling fingers she began to open the envelope, dreading but also needing the words that would be inside. She pulled out a single sheet of paper, neatly folded and opened it up, the words swarming in front of her eyes as she struggled to control her tears. Finally she calmed herself enough to allow the letters to form and slowly she began reading.

Elise,

Please don’t be angry with me for what I have done. You have to know that I only did this because I ran out of strength. Maybe I’m being a coward, but I can’t do this anymore.

When you left me that day I tried; I really tried to move on and to get on with my life but every day it was like another piece of me died until there was just nothing left. I knew that I couldn’t go through that kind of hurt again; I don’t have the strength to rebuild my life anymore.

I love you Elise, more than you will ever know and I understand why you did what you did but I can’t just stand by and watch it all happen again – and we both know that it will. I can’t be close to you but not be with you, the pain is too intense. Too much. I am done Elise.

Please don’t feel guilty; this is just the way it has to be.

Look after Stephen, he will need you. Trust me. And maybe one day he’ll tell you everything and you’ll understand why I have done this.

You are my life, Elise Grayson, and without you there is no life.

I will wait for you in heaven, my darling Angel.

Yours always and forever, Vaughn. x x x

The stupid, stupid, stupid fucking bastard.

Why the hell didn’t he try to talk to her? Tell her how he was feeling? They could have worked through it all; she knew they could have done.

But he couldn’t talk to her, could he? She had cut him out of her life in the cruellest way possible. She had taken his love, and she had thrown it back in his face. She had walked out on him for all the right reasons, which had ultimately turned out to be the totally bloody wrong reasons.

Why hadn’t she trusted in him? Trusted in what she felt. Trusted in him to keep her safe. She had been the worst kind of fool. She had turned her back on the only man that she had ever truly loved.

The tears were falling silently, streaming down her cheeks, and as she choked out a sob she silently passed the letter to Stephen. He deserved to read it and she deserved his hatred. She wasn’t going to shy from anything anymore. She would face life head on and just let it take her wherever it needed her to go.

She had already forgotten about Dale and Olivia. Her earlier euphoria evaporated as she sat in this cold and clinical room, waiting and waiting – endlessly waiting - to find out if the beautiful man that she loved with all of her heart would live. How could she ever forgive herself and carry on with her life if anything happened to him? She