All I can manage is a half-smile, too exhausted to tell her I love touching hers.
I love kissing it and smelling it and tasting it.
I want more of it.
But before I can cop another feel or two, we hear the bathroom door unlock.
Liv’s eyes flash to mine, and I hop off of her, pulling the covers up over us and looking for any clothes.
Shit.
I find my shorts and top under the covers and pull them on, the door opening just before I can button my shirt.
I hold it closed, swinging my legs over the side of the bed and pretending to be looking for something between the bed and the wall.
“You okay?” Amy asks, walking out of the bathroom.
I glance up, my heart still pounding. “Have…have you seen my yellow Chucks?” I ask, trying to hide my nerves and steel my voice.
I see Liv’s shorts on the floor and slide them under the bed with my foot.
A shoe lands on the bed. “There’s one,” Amy says.
“Thanks.”
I’m afraid to look at Liv. Knowing her, she’s probably smiling.
“Give me five minutes.” Amy holds the towel wrapped around her head, clasping her clothes to her towel-wrapped body. “I need to rinse out this hair mask, and then you can have the shower.”
“No rush,” I chirp.
Amy shuts herself in the bathroom again, and I swipe Liv’s shorts out from under the bed and walk around to the other side, tossing them to her and buttoning my shirt. I catch sight of myself in the mirror, locks of my hair in spirals like a bird’s nest that’s been through a tornado.
I pull the covers off her, avoiding looking at her body. “Get dressed.”
I’m not satisfied. Not nearly, and everything aches. I don’t want to leave her. I don’t want to leave her arms.
She sighs, rising from the bed, and I see her black panties on the sheets and pick them up.
I stare at them, thinking about her other pair that I have.
“I want more,” I whisper, sitting on the bed. “I want to make noise.”
She stands in front of me, and I raise my eyes, taking in her smooth stomach, and how I want my turn to taste her under the sheets.
I wince, something inside of me hurting, just looking at her.
Opening her underwear, I lean down, waiting as she steps into them.
“Sleep over at my house tonight,” she tells me.
I pull her panties up her legs as I hear the shower come on. Liv pulls on her tank top. “Your whole family will know,” I say.
She falls silent, and I know I’ve said something wrong.
I meet her eyes, seeing a question in hers. “Don’t look at me like that.” I pick up her shorts off the bed and help her into them, and I’m not sure why I’m dressing her. “I’m still trying to figure out what’s happening. Just let me enjoy this before the whole world has an opinion about it.”
“Relax, Clay.” She brushes my hair out of my eye. “I’m not going to out you. You want to keep it quiet, that suits me too.”
Why?
I cock my head at her.
She just shrugs. “I mean, it’s not like this is a relationship, right?”
Well… I open my mouth but nothing comes out. I guess not. I hadn’t thought that far ahead.
Just that she’s the only option for me. She’s the only thing I want in the world.
“In a few months, you’ll be going to one college,” she says, “and I’ll be going to another. And I’m still not entirely sure I like you, so…”
At that, I smile. “You like me.” I glide my fingers up her legs, teasing her. “And you are coming back to school.”
She cocks a brow.
“I’ll be so pleasant,” I play.
Like soooooo pleasant.
“So, a piece of ass is enough to get me back to that shithole?”
“Not just any piece of ass,” I remind her. “And I’ll get even better with practice.”
I know it was my first time, and I know she’ll probably lose patience, having to teach me everything, but I’m a fast learner.
She tips my chin up, no longer smiling. “Don’t change a thing,” she orders.
A shiver runs through me, and I hold her waist, staring up at her.
I don’t want peoples’ reactions to this. I just want her. That’s it. Why can’t I have what I want?
I just don’t want to have those conversations with people like this is any of their business.
But I’m not ready to stop. We’ve already gotten it on, and whether my