waiter brought our food. After setting it down, he walked away. I grabbed my silverware and started to eat my salad. “Honestly, I haven’t been all that great. I’ve been staying at Heath’s to help him… He was in such bad shape.” That was all I could say about it.
Anna had pity in her eyes, but she was also quiet, like she didn’t know what to say. She was loyal to Damien, and she also had a strong attachment to my father. Her feelings were obviously conflicted. “Is he doing better now?”
“Much,” I said quietly. “He’s not the kind of man to let anything defeat him, so he’s working hard to heal.”
“That’s good.” She pushed her salad around with her fork.
I could feel it beginning already, feel the awkwardness that descended on the table when we discussed the man I was sleeping with, the man who had been unanimously ostracized by my family, even Anna, who wasn’t actually married to my brother yet.
“So…you’re going to stay with him, then?” She stabbed her fork into her food, bits of egg, bacon, and cheese, before placing it into her mouth. There was a melancholy tone to her voice, as if what she asked was forbidden.
“I…I don’t know what I’m doing.” I tried not to think about the decision I would have to face since I was falling more in love with him every second I was by his side. He looked at me in a way no one else ever had, like he saw me all the way down to the bone.
She stopped eating, giving me all of her attention. “Yeah… I can’t imagine.”
“This is the man I love. But I know everything Damien said is right. It’s not the kind of relationship that I want forever.”
“Then be with him until it burns out. You’re young.”
“I’ve thought of that, but I’m afraid it’ll just get harder and harder to leave.”
“Yeah…”
I pushed aside a big chunk of tomato then went straight for the cheese crumble. “I don’t understand why this is happening to me. I don’t know why I have to love a man who’s not right for me.” Why did the gypsy give me that reading? This was bound to happen whether I visited her or not, but why did it have to happen at all?
“I’m sorry, Cat. Did you tell him about all this?”
I shook my head. “No. If I do, he’ll try to talk me out of it, and I’ll be stuck. I need to think it over for a while, then make a clean break if I decide to.”
“Honestly, it sounds like you’ve already made up your mind.”
I looked at her. “Yeah?”
“It sounds like you’re going to leave him…eventually.”
I dropped my gaze, my heart breaking at the thought. What we had was real, true, and I didn’t want to live my life without that man beside me. But I didn’t want to lose my family either, lose the future I’d pictured in my head since I was young. My father wouldn’t be around much longer, and Damien would be the only family I had left.
When I got home, Heath had already showered after his workout. He wore sweatpants without a shirt, standing in the kitchen while he put together a sandwich for lunch. His ribs were no longer wrapped and there were still blotches of discoloration on his skin, but he wasn’t the punching bag he used to be. His firm muscles were visible again, his fair skin beautiful now that some of it had healed.
He tore a few pieces of lettuce and placed it on top. “You want a sandwich?”
“No, I already ate.” He didn’t ask me where I’d been even though he knew I’d left the house. I moved into him, seeing the strong muscles of his back.
He turned to me, his arm circling my waist as he pulled me in. His face looked down into mine, and he stared at me like he was waiting for permission. His mouth wasn’t cut up anymore, and the swelling had gone down. He had even healed enough to shave.
We hadn’t kissed yet. He’d been too injured for that kind of affection. But now he looked at me like he wanted to, like he wanted to embrace me the way he used to. He tugged me a little closer, his large hand spreading across my entire back.
I rose on my tiptoes, my eyes open and locked on to his, and I kissed him.