I swallow, knowing this will be the hardest confession of all. “I didn’t think he would want to, but I woke up the next day to a message from him, wanting me to meet him to talk about the role. He still wanted me to audition, and I was so happy. I went, of course, but…”
Monica’s expression turns fierce, like she already fears what I’m about to tell her. “But what?”
“When I got to his room, he… propositioned me.”
“You mean with sex? He wanted sex in exchange for giving you the role, didn’t he?”
I have to swallow hard to push back the ball of emotion rising in my throat. “He said I would have a hard time getting an acting job after what happened, but he’d be willing to consider me if I…” I can’t even say the words, and I don’t have to.
“Please tell me you socked the bastard straight in his dick hole.”
I stifle a laugh. Only my sister would find the words “dick hole” to be threatening. “No, but I left, and then I got on the first flight to Seattle to figure my shit out. The only thing I’ve figured out is that I don’t want to go back to modeling or acting.”
“Are you sure? Don’t let one asshole ruin your dreams of acting, Mags. He’s not worth it.”
“Acting was just as much my dream as modeling was. It’s not what I want now.”
“But you’re so great in front of a camera. I was always so envious with how natural that came for you. So you think you just fell out of love?”
I shrug. “I’m not sure I know what love feels like anymore. And I might have once said I didn’t believe in love in that way, but living here and seeing how much you’re thriving makes me want the same thing for myself.”
“Oh, Maggie.” Monica slips off the chair and sits beside me on my bed. She hugs me from the side as a tear slips from her eye. “You’ll find your passion too. I promise. And there’s nothing wrong with not knowing what you want to do. That’s what school is for, and random cooking classes.”
We both laugh.
Monica hugs me harder. “People always talk about taking the leap toward your dreams, taking risks, and building your wings along the way—but there’s something to say for taking a leap away from the things that do more harm than good. You’ll still build your wings, Mags. And when you finally catch the right current, I think you’ll be surprised by how high you soar.”
Now I’m tearing up and hugging my sister back. “I love you, M.”
“I love you, too, Mags.”
15
Free Ticket
Maggie
Monica eventually curled up in bed with me last night, and she’s still in my apartment when I peel open my eyes in the morning.
“Morning, sunshine,” she sings from my bathroom, far too chipper for me.
I squint at her and groan. “You are not all dolled up already for the game, are you?”
She grins as she smears a thick stripe of gold face paint beneath each eye. “I am.”
“It doesn’t start for hours.”
“Early bird catches the booze, they say.”
“No one has ever said that in the history of ever.”
She shrugs and continues primping. “You should come with me sometime. I already promised the tickets to some friends today, but maybe the next home game?”
The way her voice picks up at the ends, so innocent and hopeful, it actually makes me want to say yes.
“Ugh, that reminds me,” I say, “I have to work the game today for White Water. I probably should be getting ready too.”
I should have known Monica’s eyes would light at the sound of me going anywhere near a game. “Did you say you’re coming to the game?”
“It’s just some pregame beer-garden thing outside the stadium.”
Monica grins. “Which means you’ll be free during the game? I’m sure we can find you a spare ticket.” She perks up. “In fact, I think I know someone who has one.”
Her excitement is palpable, but it only makes me want to climb into a dark hole.
My heart squeezes in my chest. I can’t believe I’m actually toying with the idea of agreeing to this. “I don’t know. What if I get into the game, and I’m a miserable cow for whoever gives me their ticket? One look at Dad, and I’ll probably run for the hills.”
“Mags, it’s been over four months since you moved here. Are you seriously