the first time is cause for celebration. We’re going to get back in that car, we’re going to turn the radio up and party, and maybe after we spend all of Lance Jacobs’ money on supplies, we’ll go out to eat to celebrate.”
A smile tugs at my lips. Excitement burrows a hole in my stomach and opens, letting out butterflies that tickle my insides. He’s right. It’s not something to be afraid of. Sure, I can feel the fear, but that doesn’t mean I have to let it stop me. If I let it stop me from doing these things, I might as well just resign myself to staying in Clary my whole life, and I’ve never wanted that. Ever. “Okay,” I say, smiling.
Lucas gives me a quick shake then turns me around, pointing me back toward the car. Stone and Wyatt aren’t even trying to hide the fact that they’re curious about what’s going on. I settle the nosedive my stomach makes and brush it off. It doesn’t matter.
Lucas opens the backdoor for me, and I slide inside. He closes it after me and then gets in the passenger seat. “Let’s go,” he says, but his voice doesn’t have the same amount of cheer it just did. He reaches over to turn on the radio, and his jaw feathers. He scrubs at his cheek like he has a festering wound there. When he turns to look at me, though, he winks, a broad grin tugging his lips that should be on display behind a glass case if it wasn’t so fake.
It’s the switch between anger and happiness, and they all wear it so damn well.
With the radio on and Wyatt deciding to serenade us all the way into Leedsville, the rest of the ride is better. It also helps that I know where the fear is stemming from. I can deal with it as it breaches the surface, telling myself that living in my father’s bubble was never the way to go. I always wanted much more than that, and now I’m finally getting it.
In reality, the car ride doesn’t take that long at all. We pull into Leedsville fifteen minutes later which is much more modern and boasts a sleeker Welcome sign than Clary has ever thought of having.
I press against the glass as I watch the houses give way to modern buildings. A town only fifteen minutes away, and I’ve never been to it. I tell myself I’ll unpack that later because I don’t want to miss anything. Their downtown area is bigger than ours, and more people are out on the streets here than there ever is in Clary. “Jeez, if this is Leedsville, I can’t imagine what Phoenix is like.”
“Wait, what?” Wyatt asks. He pushes up the brim of his cowboy hat to get a better look at me.
Lucas turns in his seat, eyeballing his friend. “Don’t.”
Wyatt’s eyes flash. He looks like he wants to say so much more, but he doesn’t. I look back out the window, but Stone catches my gaze in the rearview mirror. His eyes are narrowed as he watches me, and I realize I’ve just given myself away.
I shake it off and narrow my gaze right back at him before turning away. The last thing I need is to hear Stone Jacobs’ thoughts on me growing up so sheltered. Someone like him wouldn’t get it.
25
We get out of the car at the sporting goods store, and Lucas entwines our fingers. I feel like a fish out of water next to all these people, and I guess I really am one. It doesn’t matter how much I’ve experienced through books, being out with other people is both thrilling and daunting. Lucas’s quiet strength helps though.
Wyatt and Stone take note of our joined hands but don’t say anything. I’m glad for that because I don’t want to give it up.
The automatic doors open before us as soon as we cross the parking lot and approach the sporting goods store. We step inside, and I stop. Wyatt runs into me from behind. He immediately grabs my hips, tugging me against him. “You can’t just stop in the middle of the walkway, Tits.”
“Sorry,” I say in awe while I gaze around at everything. There are things everywhere. Shirts. Pants. Shoes. Kayaks. I’m in a sea of stuff. New stuff. Bright and shiny and just waiting to be purchased and taken home by their new owner.
Lucas tightens his hold on me, spurring me to move.