The Terminal Experiment - Robert J. Sawyer Page 0,62
energies to things that actually made a difference, rather than to silly contests that in the end changed nothing. Spirit continued to search, going through file after file.
And, at last, he came upon a subdirectory called A-LIFE. Here, blue fish were evolving, the ones judged most fit getting to breed. Spirit watched several generations go by, fascinated by the process. Life, he thought.
Life.
Finally, Spirit had found something that intrigued him.
CHAPTER 30
Enough time had elapsed, Sarkar felt, for the sims to have adapted to their new circumstances. It was time to start posing the big questions. Sarkar and Peter were both tied up with other things for the next couple of days, but finally they got together at Mirror Image, and ensconced themselves in the computer lab. Sarkar brought Ambrotos into the foreground. He was about to begin asking it questions, but thought better of it. “It’s your mind,” Sarkar said. “You should ask the questions.”
Peter nodded and cleared his throat. “Hello, Ambrotos,” he said.
“Hello, Peter,” said that mechanical voice.
“What is immortality really like?”
Ambrotos took a long time before replying, as if contemplating all of eternity first. “It’s … relaxing, I suppose is the best word for it.” Another pause. Nothing was rushed. “I hadn’t realized how much pressure aging put on us. Oh, I know women sometimes say their biological clock is ticking. But there’s a bigger clock affecting all of us—at least people like you and me, driven people, people with a need to accomplish things. We know we’ve only got a limited amount of time, and there’s so much we want to get done. We curse every wasted minute.” Another pause. “Well, I don’t feel that anymore. I don’t feel the pressure to do things quickly. I still want to accomplish things, but there’ll always be tomorrow. There’ll always be more time.”
Peter considered. “I’m not sure I’d consider being less driven an improvement. I like getting things done.”
Ambrotos’s reply was infinitely calm. “And I like relaxing. I like knowing that if I want to spend three weeks or three years learning about something that strikes my fancy that I can, without it somehow reducing my productive time. If I feel like reading a novel today instead of working on some project, what’s wrong with that?”
“But,” said Peter, “you know, as I do now, that there’s some form of life after death. Don’t you wonder about that?”
The sim laughed. “You and I never believed in life after death. Even now, even knowing that, yes, something does survive the physical demise of the body, I’m not attracted to whatever afterlife there might be. Clearly, it would be beyond physical existence—it would involve the intellect but not the body. I never thought of myself as a sensualist, and we both know we’re not very athletic. But I like sex. I like feeling sun on my skin. I like eating a really good meal. I even like eating lousy meals. I’d miss my body if it wasn’t there. I’d miss physical stimulation. I’d miss— I’d miss everything. Gooseflesh and being tickled and cutting a really good fart and running my hand over my five-o’clock shadow. All of it. Sure, life after death might be forever, but so is physical immortality—and I like the physical part.”
Peter was guarded; Sarkar was listening intently. “What about—what about our relationship with Cathy? I guess you think the whole marriage is just a tiny blip in a vast life?”
“Oh, no,” said Ambrotos. “Funny—despite that crack Colin Godoyo made, I’d thought that an immortal would rue the day he’d sworn to do anything until death do us part. But I don’t feel that way at all. In fact, this has added a whole new dimension to marriage. If Cathy becomes immortal, too, there’s a chance—a real chance—that I may finally, actually, completely get to know her. In the fifteen years we’ve been living together, I’ve already gotten to know her better than any other human being. I know what sort of risqué jokes will make her giggle, and what kinds will turn her right off. I know how important her ceramics are to her. I know that she’s not really serious when she says she doesn’t like horror films, but that she is absolutely serious when she says she doesn’t like 1950s rock music. And I know how bright she is—brighter than me, in a lot of ways; after all, I’ve never been able to do The New York Times crossword.