shirt up my chest and I tense, halting my movements. “They’re still healing,” I explain. No matter how much I want his hands and mouth on me without the barrier of my shirt, I won’t risk it. I’m already pushing my luck letting it go this far.
“I’m just going to look.”
I bite down on my lower lip, suddenly feeling nervous, but I nod anyway. Slowly, he lifts my shirt, exposing my bare tits to the cold air. I shiver and he sucks in a breath at the sight. He dips his head, still holding my hands above my head.
“Thayer,” I warn, squirming beneath him.
“You have everyone fooled, don’t you?” he murmurs, bringing his lips to the underside of my breast, kissing the sensitive flesh. “They don’t know about this side of you,” he continues, grinding into me at the same time. “So innocent. So pure. But they don’t know what you like to do with your stepbrother in the dark.”
The pulsing between my legs intensifies in spite of his words, or maybe because of them, and I speed up my movements, close to the edge. He gives one last lick to the swell of my breast before moving to the other side, his free hand snaking around my waist, making me arch into him.
“Oh God,” I whisper as he grinds into me, his breath hot on my skin. All I can feel and smell and think is Thayer, and having him touch me like this is overwhelming me both physically and emotionally. I tremble beneath him, and I don’t know if I’m going to cry or come first, but I know I don’t want him to stop.
His open mouth ghosts across my nipple, barely grazing the tip, and when his piercing nudges mine, I tense up, falling over the edge. Thayer hooks a hand under my knee to lift my leg, slowly working me back down to Earth, and when I finally open my eyes, he’s hovering over me, still fully clothed in his hoodie and all, peering down at me with an inscrutable expression.
Reality crashes into me all too soon and I suddenly feel vulnerable and exposed and I hate it.
How can you simultaneously love and hate how a person makes you feel?
Without a single word, Thayer captures the key in his fist before yanking it from my neck. I gasp, not expecting it, and then he’s pocketing the string and pulling away from me to stand.
“Don’t lie to me again.”
Thayer
Fuck. Goddammit. I slam the front door, bypassing Holden and Christian groping some chicks on the couch in the family room, and head straight to my room upstairs. An image of Shayne lying shell-shocked and half-naked plays in my mind. I shouldn’t have allowed myself to be alone with her. I underestimated the effect she still has on me. She’s been fucking with my head since the moment she came back. She’s the only thing that gives me a distraction from this past year, but I can’t let myself forget that she played a part. Maybe. Fuck, I don’t know anymore. When she was gone, everything was so clear, and now? Now I don’t know which way is up. I don’t know what’s real. All I know is that I can’t let it happen again.
A knock on my door pulls me from my thoughts, followed by Holden’s voice. “You good, man?”
“Fine,” I snap, not wanting any company when my dick is still half-hard, but he opens the door anyway, letting himself in. Christian trails in behind him, sitting in the chair at my desk while Holden opts for the edge of my bed.
“What’s good?” Holden asks.
“Not shit. Go back to your party.”
“We got rid of them,” Christian supplies, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees.
I nod, then lace my fingers together behind my head and blow out a breath. “It’s almost been a year.”
Holden shakes his head, staring off blankly, while Christian’s eyes are fixed on his shoes.
“A whole fucking year, and we still don’t have answers.”
“Maybe there aren’t any,” Holden says, still not looking at me. “Maybe he really just fucking fell.”
“You said he was acting cagey the day before,” I remind him. “So was Dad.” I wouldn’t know. I was too wrapped up in a pretty blonde distraction with the face of an angel to notice anything else.
Holden scratches the back of his neck. “I don’t know, man. When isn’t Dad being weird as fuck?”
I look over at my cousin. “What about you? You think