Taken by a Vampire (Vampire Queen) - By Joey W. Hill Page 0,80

but pulled herself up short. Self-pleasuring was forbidden.

It didn’t matter anyway. Her much smaller hands didn’t feel like his. The heat and solidity of him beneath her was missing, the pressure of his aroused cock between her thighs.

She rose, surveyed the yard. “No need for a woman’s help,” she mimicked. Well, he hadn’t turned down her breakfast, had he? She could cook up some more things, but making too much food would be wasteful. The cabin was clean and well-ordered, and of course the small outside area was well tended.

What do you want? Need? What can I do? Wandering back into the cabin, she moved to the trapdoor, squatted and laid her hand there. The vampires she knew didn’t sleep with their servants, and she supposed Evan was no different. She imagined him sleeping, though, wondered if he slept on his side or stomach. Niall sprawled out like a lazy bear, unafraid of anything. The few times she had to come into Stephen’s chamber during his sleep she found he kept his back to the wall, arms drawn up close as if protecting himself from attack.

She had an odd desire to simply lay down on the trapdoor, curl up there to be as close to her Master as was allowed. Like a pet shut out of the bedroom, knowing her proper place was at her Master’s feet, on his bed, where she could be near if he needed her. It was pathetic, she knew it was, but they hadn’t given her any boundaries, tasks, rules.

Fine. She’d meditate. That was what an InhServ did when she had no immediate responsibilities.

Taking a seat on the picnic table outside, she crossed her legs in the lotus position. Back straight, hands relaxed and open on the knees. Deep breaths in and out. Though her eyes closed, she still saw the beautiful view before her. She began to work through the chant that would cycle her brain into the right state.

Service, not self. There is no self. Desire, need, want. All for my Master. His needs, his desires, his wants. I am perfection because I am Service. Every thought, every act, every breath belongs to him. With my last breath, with the last beat of my heart, I exist only for his benefit. I am Slave, with no need for name.

She remembered the joy she’d experienced when she’d first learned the mantra. She’d gilded it with more devotionals, guided by her impulsive euphoria during the first days of her in-house training. They’d been required to recite it during the lessons that taught acceptance of pain and punishment. The trainers knew how to give out maximum doses of pain without marring pure flesh, a blank canvas intended only for the vampire’s marking. The pain didn’t matter. That mantra, spoken through every act of service others might consider torment, only increased her commitment. She could get lost in the words while a whip struck her naked flesh, wouldn’t flinch from flame brought so close to that same flesh it felt scorched. It wasn’t until after she was assigned to Stephen that she understood the true reason the training had reinforced that mantra.

Just as a child grew to adulthood, learning the difference between romance and love, she’d learned the difference between the idea of pure service and the reality of it. But there was a strength and depth to the reality the idea could never provide. So why was it she was back to that romantic yearning, as if that fantasy truly was out there, intertwined with the deeper reality to create the perfect meshing? Something she’d fallen just short of finding, because she hadn’t been a good enough servant to get there.

Meditation wasn’t going to work. Her throat was tight, her stomach hurting. Suppressing a sigh, she opened her eyes.

She found herself looking at a black bear, who’d apparently lumbered from the wood and was now no more than three feet away from her picnic table, wet nose stretched out to sniff the oddly still human.

She blinked. She could remain motionless before vampires like Lady Lyssa, who had reduced lesser vampires to cowering gelatin with a glance. She was not going to run shrieking into the cabin. But it was a big black bear. A bear that now rose on his hind legs and planted his taloned paws on the bench next to her. The rumbling noise that he made could be a harmless inquiry, or a pre-dinner growl. She knew several languages, but not one of