Taboo Boss - Natasha L. Black Page 0,58

to ask it. The question just came out as soon as it formed in my thoughts. I felt terrible for asking it. This definitely wasn’t the sort of question you brought up on a happy night everybody was enjoying together. Especially when you barely knew the person. I waited for Susan to be offended or angry. Instead, she offered me a smile.

“Better,” she said. “Thank you for asking. Sometimes I feel like most people have forgotten. Or are doing everything they can to pretend they have. Not you, Ava. Ava has never forgotten. She makes sure she checks in on me and listens when I need to talk. But a lot of people around town, even my boys, try to avoid even mentioning him.”

“I’m sorry,” I said. Even as I said it, I was relieved she wasn’t upset by it.

She shrugged and went back to drying the dish in her hands. “I guess I can understand it. They’re hurting, too. Maybe they don’t want to talk about him because it hurts too much. But that’s why I want to talk about him. It makes me feel closer. Like he’s still here with me.”

“He is,” Ava said. “He always will be.”

Tears stung in the backs of my eyes, and I felt a separation from the two women standing there in the kitchen with me. They had experienced something together I was not a part of. I certainly wasn’t envious of it. It hurt enough to hear about Tom’s father without me having known him. But it was also a reminder that I was coming into a strong and well-established family.

Whatever was happening between Tom and me, I was getting a chance to be a part of something really special.

We finished the dishes and cleaned up the kitchen. Susan handed each of us a beer and shooed us toward the back porch.

“You two go on out there and relax,” she said.

“Aren’t you coming with us?” Ava asked.

“No,” Susan said, shaking her head. “Not my scene. I have a cuddle and game show date with my grandson.”

Robert had been napping in his playpen in the living room but was now awake and gurgling. She scooped him up. I watched the smile cross Ava’s face and felt my heart warm.

She went over and gave her baby a kiss on his face before we walked outside to join the boys. The door to the porch was standing open, so they didn’t hear us coming. Tom had his back to us, and Mason was at a slight diagonal from him. He didn’t notice us before talking.

“So, what’s going on with you and Amanda?” he asked. “You guys seem to be getting close.”

My breath caught slightly in my chest as I waited to hear what he was going to say. Ava’s eyes slid over to mine. She had a slight smile on her face, like she felt the same anticipation. But Tom’s answer was enough to wipe both of our faces blank.

“Nothing. She’s my secretary. It’s strictly professional,” he said.

It was like a wrecking ball had swung directly into the middle of my gut. I was so stunned, I couldn’t even move. Ava cleared her throat angrily, and Tom turned around. His face dropped, his expression going to surprise and shock.

I could only feel sadness now I knew what he really thought.

“Well,” I said to Ava, “I guess that’s a conversation I don’t need to have. Will you give me a ride back to the hotel?”

Tom rushed to put his beer down and jump to his feet, coming around the side of the chair where he was sitting so he could come toward me.

“You can ride with me,” he said. “We can leave now if you want to.”

I shook my head and held up a hand to stop his progress toward me. “No need. I don’t want to impose.”

He started to say something else, but I turned and rushed back into the house before he could. Ava hurried after me.

“Susan, I’m going to take Amanda back to the hotel. I’ll be back,” she said.

We got into her car, and I stared directly in front of me. I didn’t want to look at her, afraid of the emotions that might hit me if I did. I wasn’t crying, but that came as a surprise. If I knew I would hear Tom say something like that, I would have expected to be a mess.

Instead, it was almost as though I couldn’t bring myself to cry. All I could do