near the story area. I had a big circular rug with bright primary colors in a geometric design where the children would sit. The white bookshelves were stacked with an assortment of picture books.
I stood up from behind my desk. “You were at counseling today?” I asked.
He nodded.
“How’d it go?”
Again he answered with a nod. “I stopped by to take you out to dinner.”
“Out to dinner as in a restaurant?” I asked, remembering what had happened the last time we’d attempted an outing. Eating in a crowded restaurant had been way out of his comfort zone.
“I’m ready, Em.”
Despite my reservations about the two of us spending time together, I smiled, pleased for him. “That’s wonderful, Nick.”
He smiled back at me. “Can’t think of anything I’d enjoy more than taking my girl out to eat.”
My girl. That gave me pause.
I checked my watch, automatically looking for an excuse. “It’s a bit early for dinner.”
“I’ll wait.” He sat down on top of one of the tiny desks, his massive figure dwarfing it.
I hesitated and made busywork while my mind feverishly came up with an excuse to avoid an intimate dinner with Nick. Fragile as he was emotionally, I didn’t want to hurt him, and at the same time I needed to protect myself.
“When does school start?” he asked conversationally.
“Right after Labor Day.”
He crossed his arms and kept a close watch on me as I continued walking about the room.
“I know what you’re doing, Em. You’ve been avoiding me and I know why, but you’re wrong.”
“Am I?” I doubted that, but it would be pointless to argue with him.
“Yes. Not going to make a fuss, just want you to know I’m aware and I’m not going to let you do it.”
“Nick, please.” I clenched my hands in front of me.
“You can try telling me you aren’t attracted to me, but I know otherwise. Every time we touch there’s electricity. You feel it, too, so don’t even try to deny it.”
He was right and so I kept quiet.
“It could be you’re reluctant to get involved with a guy who’s messed up in the head.”
I rolled my eyes. “You know that’s not true.”
“Didn’t think so. Glad you didn’t, ’cause I would have knocked it down.”
Again against my better judgment, I smiled. “We’ve all got issues, Nick. Some are more obvious than others.”
He stood then and walked closer to me. “Speaking of issues, when’s that wedding?”
James and Katie. I’d completely put the date out of my mind and realized the wedding was set for the upcoming weekend. I’d already decided not to attend and had actually tossed the invite.
“From the doe-eyed expression you’re wearing, I’d say you’ve decided not to go.”
“Yes, I told you that earlier.”
“Would have called you a lot of things in the last few months, but coward never entered my mind.”
I shook my head. “Call me what you want; there’s no way I’m attending that wedding.” I could just imagine the pitying looks from our friends. If I was foolish enough to go I’d be forced to put on a brave front and smile. No one would be fooled. I’d probably end up an emotional mess, blubbering all over myself. Not gonna happen.
I walked a circle around him, needing to change the subject. “Did you know I was the one who sent that real estate woman to the house to see if you were interested in selling?”
“Guessed that was the case.”
“You didn’t.” He’d never said a word. “I love that house and have from the first moment I saw it.”
His smile showed his approval. He loved that house, too, and the work and effort he’d put into modernizing it showed as much. “What in the love of heaven were you going to do living in a five-bedroom home?” he asked.
“Adopt children.” I figured letting him know I never intended to marry would sound overly dramatic. That was the plan, however, and one I was fairly certain would be part of my future.
He nodded as though he approved. “Good plan. That was what Brad intended to do.”
“I’d still like to buy the house.”
“Not for sale. You can live in it if you want, though. With me.”
“Nick.”
“You think I’m not serious?”
I could see it was going to take more than me avoiding Nick to get the message across. My plan was to ease my way slowly out of his life and let him get involved back in the world again. Once he did, I was convinced that whatever he felt for me would eventually fade