The Sweet Talker (Boston Hawks Hockey #1) - Gina Azzi Page 0,51

through the line. “Noah, you’re really into Little Indy.”

“I know,” I sigh, hating this. Why the hell do I have to have feelings for the one girl I can’t really have? I mean, sure, I can have her. But I don’t deserve her. I shouldn’t want her. The only thing a guy like me offers to a woman like Indy are complications, instability, and at some point, resentment.

“Why don’t you talk to her?” my brother asks slowly, trying to keep his voice neutral.

I stand from the bed again, energy bursting though my limbs. “I can’t, man. She was really clear about what she wanted, what her expectations are. We both were. And now, what? I’m going to flip the script on her, take back all the things I said because she’s fucking amazing? It will just mess with her head, or make things weird between us, and I don’t want to do either of those things.”

“Yeah, but, isn’t she going to figure out you’re acting strange? I mean, you’re checked out, Noah. You’ve got three big games on the horizon and your head is in fucking la-la land over a woman you’re not even going to make yours.”

Not going to make yours.

That’s a damn bitter pill to swallow.

I swear. Because, fuck, my brother is right. I can’t make Indy mine, not the way I want to. Not when she deserves the moon and the stars and I can only give her a damn asteroid. Besides, I do need to get my head in the game. Literally. Hockey isn’t a guarantee. My spot on the Hawks isn’t a sure thing, neither is Easton’s. Look what’s happening to Torsten.

Jesus. I can’t let myself spin out like this. I swore after Courtney, I was going to put hockey before everything. Look at me. I’m freaking out over a woman, at least I know she’s the woman, but it’s not going to happen and I know that too.

“I need to let her go,” I murmur.

“What?” East asks.

“I’m going to her house for Thanksgiving.”

“You’re going to a family dinner at a woman’s house?” Easton’s tone is hushed.

“She’s still a Merrick,” I point out.

“Yeah, but one you’ve been inside of.”

I cringe at his vulgarity. “I need to talk to her. Ease things between us. We spend too much time together. We’re falling into this, this dating, when we’re supposed to be casual. She needs to go on a date.”

My brother laughs but when I don’t join in, he stops.

“That’s a terrible, awful, dumb idea.”

“Thanks, East.”

“Noah, I’m serious. Just…talk to her. Two minutes ago, you wanted to hit Edwards because he dated Indy in college. Now, you want to set her up?”

“I have to,” I say, turning the idea over in my mind. Damn, it will gut me. Piss me off. Hurt. But it’s for the best. It’s what’s best for her. I care about Indy and as a man who wants her to have the life she wants, I know she needs a guy who’s nothing like me. She needs someone who shares her interests, who has a stable career, who might not be living across the country next year.

“Noah, think about what you’re saying,” Easton admonishes me.

“I have.” I nod as if to emphasize the decision to myself. “This is what’s best for Indy. I gotta do right by her, East.”

I eat those words six hours later when my fist connects with Jace Edwards’ jaw.

Shit. I pull back, shaking out my hand.

“Are you out of your fucking mind?” Edwards cups his face.

Torsten skates in between us and angles his body in front of mine. “Fuck off, Edwards. You’re lucky you’re even playing tonight.”

A true testament to Edwards’ character is that only one of his teammates tries to insert himself in our brawl and I think it’s more out of obligation than friendship.

I flip my chin to the kid, a young guy who was picked up by Vancouver this season, and back off.

“You good?” Torsten skates beside me as whistles chirp in the background.

I nod, scraping a hand over my face. I shouldn’t have punched him. I know it. But when that fucker looked at me and grinned, yelling too fucking loudly “Heard you’re tasting my leftovers. Who knew you liked sloppy seconds?” I lost it.

First off, how the hell does he even know about Indy and me? I know it’s a small world and all that but my team is discreet. I haven’t even addressed Austin about my relationship, or lack thereof, with his cousin.