Spurred by concern, he quickly typed out his response. Okay.
The seconds ticked by without an additional ping. Ben could have stepped away from his phone, or maybe the battery had died. Maybe it was nothing, but after the rapid-fire exchange, he couldn’t ignore the extended silence. Thinking quickly, he changed the subject, hoping to elicit a response. Is Ben short for Benjamin?
Yes. The reply came quick. Almost as quickly as the ping of the follow-up message. Sorry.
For? Things had started out well. Bull sensed there was more to Ben’s hesitation, and he hated pushing the point, especially after the long pause. But every assessment in his mind told him not to let it go.
Waiting, he stared at the phone’s display, willing it to ping with a new message. Aidan had once told him that silence was a powerful tool during interrogations. He was curious to test the theory. He had enough patience to wait all night if necessary.
The ping came nearly five minutes later. I don’t want to screw this up.
He stared at Ben’s words. He debated how best to settle the rising tension in their exchange. He called up the video app on his phone, confident the default system app would be on Ben’s phone since it was the same model. A few seconds later, a picture of Ben’s face filled his screen. Bull had expected the flush of color present on Ben’s cheeks and the way he chewed on his bottom lip. But he hadn’t anticipated the redness and shine in Ben’s eyes.
“I’ll keep this short, then we’ll go back to text. Okay?”
Ben hesitantly nodded.
“Are you okay?”
Ben looked away for a moment and exhaled a shaky breath. There was a slight sniffle he tried to disguise before he returned his attention to the screen and nodded. He held his right hand in an “A” up to his chest and rotated his hand in a clockwise circle a few times. His expression pained.
“You have nothing to be sorry about,” Bull firmly said, refusing to let Ben think otherwise. “I promised I would keep this short and I know you don’t want to video chat. But I wanted you to look at me when I tell you what I need to say.”
Ben’s gaze didn’t waver.
“Honesty and trust. That’s what’s important. Okay?” He continued after receiving a nod in response. “I’ll earn your trust, but you need to give me honesty, and I’ll do the same in return. Okay?”
Ben nodded again.
“One more thing…”
Ben held his gaze.
“I don’t want to screw this up either.”
An exhale of relief escaped Ben, almost as if he had been holding his breath the entire time. A slow-building smile suddenly appeared. Bull couldn’t help grinning in return before keeping his word and disconnecting the video call. He called up his messaging app again, hoping to have eased the tension in their exchange.
He wasn’t ready to call it a night yet.
= ♥ =
Ben held the phone to his chest as he took another deep breath. The no had come quickly, almost as fast as the total freak-out afterward. Although he had joked with Julian the other night, Ben hadn’t realized how difficult saying no would actually be when he didn’t want to disappoint someone. Especially when he felt he had something to lose.
He didn’t know what was happening between them—a friendship or possibly something more—but he didn’t want to risk crushing it before it had a chance to bloom.
He pulled the phone away from his chest, quickly thumbing through the gallery of photos. Even though that dimple short-circuited his brain, he had managed to snap a screenshot of Gabriel’s smile before ending the video call. His breath hitched when he found the shot. He quickly assigned that smile and dimple to Gabriel’s contact record. His phone vibrated with a new message as soon as he hit save.
Now tell me why you got upset.
Ben huffed out a breath. He hated lying. Correction. He sucked at lying. Gabriel wanted honesty, that he could totally do. Texting is easier. It didn’t take long for Gabriel’s response to arrive.
You had already said that. So why did that upset you so much?
Ben scrunched his face, trying to think of the best—honest—answer. Because I knew you wanted to do video instead.
You thought I’d be upset?
Another easy reply. Yes.
So you thought saying NO to me would piss me off and somehow mess up whatever is happening between us?
He ducked his head as he typed out his reply. Yes. He hit send, then quickly added another