There’s no other explanation for why I not only allowed Sterling to touch me, but liked it, too. Even now, my body is singing his praises while the more logical part of me is scrambling to make sense of any of it.
I mean, how is it possible for one man to affect me so? He can disarm as quickly as he can antagonize me. Truly, the man is infuriating. He’s cold. Cruel and calculating. He’s told me time and time again; he wants to ruin me.
Even worse, how could I allow it? How could I allow him of all people to touch me?
I haven’t let a man touch me since Rob. Not a single one.
I swore that the next time I so much as held hands with a man, it would be on my terms, with someone I love and trust.
Not a hate-kiss in a dark office, with a man who’s been so cruel.
And what do you know... I let him.
In more ways than one, because how will any other kiss measure up?
I showed him my weak underbelly when I didn’t push him away. My pathetic half-assed protests may as well have been me begging for more.
Which I would’ve done, if that door wouldn’t have slammed.
Sterling is a bully, and everything I despise in a man, and yet my lips still burn with the flames of his kiss.
My tears start anew as I berate myself for being so stupid. It’s not like he cares about me. If anything, his kiss is another game, meant to confuse me.
Rob always loved to play games; they were designed to hurt and only he ever won.
Who’s to say Sterling is any different? What’s that stupid saying… you are the company you keep? Yeah, that’s it. And Sterling and Rob have been damn near inseparable for as long as I’ve known them.
Clearly, Sterling Abbot is dangerous. I’m weak for him and now, he knows it.
How could I’ve let that happen? The question slams into my skull over and over, battering me until I’m on the verge of losing it.
“Just calm down,” I mutter to myself, willing my stupid tears to dry. The fact that I’m sitting here crying over him at all is infuriating in and of itself.
He only has power over me because I allow it. The problem is, I don’t know how to stop it. I don’t know how to wrench myself free from the hold he has over me.
But I will. If it’s the last thing I do, I will.
Finally, my tears dry and I force myself up from the bench. I shoot Stella a quick text asking her to meet me in our suite, if she can, before creeping out of my hiding place.
Except, before I can step foot back onto the sidewalk, I slam into a brick wall.
“Oof!” I stumble back, clutching my forehead.
“Sweets.” Okay, so not a wall... a Gabe. “We’ve got to stop meeting like this.”
“What do they feed you?”
He starts to flex, but something stops him. “Have you... have you been crying?”
“It’s nothing.”
“Zach!” Gabe hollers, and in the blink of an eye, he appears.
“Yeah? Oh, Emmy. Have you been crying?”
Gabe tips his head back, as if to say see, I told you!
“I’m fine, guys.”
“Tell Daddy what’s wrong,” Gabe says, linking his arm with mine.
Zach takes up post on my other side. “Whose ass do we need to kick?”
“If I had to guess, I’d say her TA.”
I roll my eyes, but don’t confirm Gabe’s suspicions. “I’m fine. I promise,” I say, mostly meaning it. Something about being smooshed between the two of them has me feeling safe and secure.
“Where are you headed?” my blond giant asks.
“My dorm.”
The two men exchange a look before Zach says, “We’ll walk you.”
They pry for more information for the entirety of our walk, but my lips stay sealed.
It’s not that I don’t want to tell them, it’s just... as crazy as it sounds, I can’t help but feel like Sterling has eyes and ears everywhere. The last thing I want is for anything to get back to him.
We slow our pace as my building comes into sight. “Thanks, guys,” I say right as a flying blonde ball slams into me, wrapping me in a frantic hug.
“Oh my God, Emmy! Where have you been? What happened? Did you let him have it? Who are these two hotties? Tell. Me. Every. Thing!”
“Well, hello there, sunshine,” Gabe murmurs as Stella releases me. “Who are you?”