Susan Mallery Page 0,98
knew she was more of a doer than a relaxer but even she liked restorative yoga. There was something calming about the various poses and the focus on breathing. She smiled. It was the kind of exercise her sister would enjoy, she thought. When Bianca had suggested a class, Margot had assumed they would go to a studio but instead an instructor had shown up at the house and had taken them through the fifty-minute session out in the garden. When they were done, Margot was so relaxed, she was practically liquid. She barely made it to the table and chairs in the gazebo, where Edna had brought out herbal tea and scones.
“That was incredible,” she said, pouring tea into two cups. “I could do that every day.”
“I’m sure you needed it,” Bianca said with a sly smile. “What with all the sex. Your muscles are being used in ways they aren’t used to.”
Margot should have known there would be a price for the class, but she told herself it was worth it.
“Not playing that game,” she said mildly, reaching for a scone.
“But we talk about my personal life all the time!”
“Your personal life is why I’m here,” she reminded her client. “I won’t discuss Alec with you.”
“Fine. Then let’s talk about the old boyfriend. The one you’ve been avoiding. What was his name? Dietrich?”
Margot considered herself fairly skilled at hiding her emotions. It was part of her job—but wow, did Bianca test her on a regular basis. Still, Dietrich was a safer subject than Alec.
“What do you want to know?” she asked.
“Why was it so awful?”
Margot considered all the stories she could tell, all the examples of how her life had been messed up because Dietrich was in it only to realize he hadn’t been the problem at all.
“I wasn’t my best self when I was with him,” she said with a shrug. “In truth, I was my worst self, and that’s on me, not him. Loving someone should make us better. It should lift us up, not drown us.”
She thought maybe she was her best self with Alec. At least she thought it might be possible. When she was around him, she felt good. He never tried to distract her from what was important or make her feel less than.
“What does that even mean?” Bianca asked.
“I suppose I’m saying that loving someone should be a positive experience for both parties. That being around the person you love shouldn’t make your life worse. That when you’re with that person, you are seeking to be better than you would be without him. Is that too vague?”
“A little, but I think I understand it. I do love being around Wesley.”
“Why?”
Bianca frowned. “What a strange question. Because he’s perfect. He’s kind and he loves me. He always has fun things to talk about.” She smiled. “The sex is fabulous.”
“This isn’t about sex.”
“Nearly everything is about sex.”
“I don’t believe that.”
“Whatever. My point is, I love Wesley. He’s nothing like some of the other men I’ve been with. I thought I’d found my best love with Sebastian but was I wrong.”
Margot had no idea who Sebastian was, but before she could ask, Bianca continued.
“He was a famous model and we did a shoot together. This was years ago. He left the business and ended up making a fortune trading stocks. We met up, oh, fifteen years later, and it was like we’d never been apart.” Her smiled turned nostalgic.
“We got engaged, then we broke up, but it wasn’t horrible, you know? Just one of those things.” She pressed her lips together. “Three years ago he wrote a biography and he didn’t mention me even once.”
She looked at Margot. “Can you believe it? I was supposed to be his great love and I didn’t even get a footnote. Then he had the balls to invite me to the launch party. Well, I didn’t go. I can tell you that!”
“What does that have to do with Wesley?”
“What? Nothing. Were we talking about him?”
“We were talking about love being a path to our best self. Love isn’t about what the other person does for you, Bianca, it’s about what we do for that person. It’s about giving. We aren’t changed by what is done to us, rather we are transformed by the act of loving someone else.”
She felt herself getting annoyed, which was not going to be helpful, nor could she actually explain her reaction. Maybe it was because in her mind, she was thinking Alec rather