Supermarket - Bobby Hall Page 0,68

he said. “But in the end, she’s the doctor and we’re the patients. We are the ones who must suffer. And as someone who has made it out of the delusion, you must heed my advice. Because it is the only way to beat this thing, Flynn.”

As I thought about what Red was saying, Olivia walked into the garden and stood in front of our table.

“Hello there,” she said.

“Olivia, I—”

“Listen, can I borrow you for a moment?” she asked, placing her hand on my arm for comfort. It worked.

“Okay,” I said, standing up. “I’m coming back after,” I told Red, then pushed my chair into the table before following Olivia.

We walked slowly, quiet for a moment. “I don’t believe you are thinking clearly, Flynn,” she finally said.

“Listen, you don’t know what this is like.” I kicked a pebble in front of me. “This has been hell. I’m fucking living in a psych ward. I’ve got some alter ego trying to ruin my life. Half the time I can’t tell what’s real and what’s fake. I’m present for no more than a couple of weeks at a time, then I’m back in the mind trap. I know I’ve been working hard in therapy and all, but damn. When will it end? Is this thing going to go on forever? Am I going to wind up on the streets, stark raving mad like my dad? I can’t take it anymore. I’ve got to beat this thing. The suffering is cruel. I know you’re only trying to help, but you’re not the one living it, you can’t feel what I’m feeling in here.”

“Yes, that’s true. I cannot feel what you feel. But . . . I’ve seen this before in you. And I don’t want you to fall back into Frank’s grip. You are at a tipping point.”

“You know what, Dr. Cross? He isn’t real. And I know that, but it’s just difficult and sometimes . . . sometimes I think it’s hard for me to let that thought go. Because that feeling is all I’ve known for so long.”

“Frank isn’t real, Flynn. Frank is something your subconscious conjured up as a last resort to aid you in the completion of your novel. Now he’s taken on a life of his own. And now, you must let it go. You must let him go.”

“You’re right!” I said. “I will fight this thing, Olivia! I will let Frank go and let go of his power over me.”

“It won’t be easy,” she said.

“I know. But I have to give it my all.”

After our talk, I returned to the table I had been sitting at with Red. He asked me how the talk went, and I told him that when speaking to Olivia, I told her everything she needed to hear. I couldn’t tell her the truth. She just wouldn’t understand.

Instead, I pretended she was right. That I needed to let Frank go. But the truth? That hadn’t worked in the two years since my breakdown.

Red had been right. He gave me vital information that day under the tree—that day when he showed me the power of the mind. In order to destroy Frank, he had to be real.

He just had to be.

CHAPTER 16

THE LETTER

I sat on my bed, checking the clock.

2:30 p.m.

I stood up and began to pace.

2:35.

I did push-ups. I never did push-ups.

2:40.

I ate a stick of gum and turned the wrapper into an origami swan.

2:45.

I couldn’t take it anymore, so I left my room and walked around the place. I still didn’t know what I was gonna say. And what would she say?

I slowly walked toward the entrance of the facility, where Mia would arrive. I started getting nervous. Maybe I shouldn’t greet her at the door? Too weird, I told myself. Too needy.

Instead, I walked back to my room.

2:50.

I’d been cooped up in this place so long, constantly obsessing over Frank and regaining my life . . . I needed a break. And Mia was the only thing I wanted. Deep down, I knew she was a huge reason why I was fighting. Because even if I did get my sanity back, get my world back . . . what’s the world without anyone to share it with?

3:00.

She would be here any minute now. I couldn’t contain myself.

3:05.

Running a little late, but it was okay. I just couldn’t wait to see her.

3:10.

I started throwing my red rubber ball against the wall of my room.

3:15 . . .

“Traffic. Has to be traffic,” I