Succubus Shadows Page 0,112
- which is why Hell has such a foothold in the world. And I'm not saying that if you believe it, it will happen. Things don't always turn out for the best, but miracles are real, Georgina. You've just got to lift yourself out of the muck to make them. You've got to take the chance."
Yes, I was definitely getting a cigarette after this. Carter probably had one on him. I gave him as much of a smile as I could muster. "Easy for you to say. Can you make miracles?"
"I try," he said. "I try. Will you?"
And with that, he vanished before I could bum a cigarette.
Fucking angels.
But his words stayed with me when I went home that night, maybe because even as depressing as they seemed, they were still more cheerful than enduring that shift. My managerial mandates were still obeyed, but otherwise, I could see the seething disapproval and condemnation in the eyes of my colleagues. It was a startling reminder of my village's reaction when everyone had found out I'd cheated on Kyriakos. Only this time, I had no way to blot it from these people's minds. I had nothing more to bargain with Hell.
At the condo, I found a note from Roman, saying he'd be staying at the school for a while that evening to finish up some setup. If I wanted, though, he'd be happy to take me out for dinner as he'd promised. That gave me time to stretch out on the couch, seeing as I was still exhausted from the emotional miasma I'd been wading through this last week. No sleep came, just a kind of bleak malaise as I stared at the ceiling. Probably just as well. God only knew what I'd dream.
Dream.
I sighed. The man in the dream. It had been bugging me over and over in my subconscious, and without even mentioning it, Carter had somehow brought it back to the fore-front of my mind. The Oneroi had claimed Seth was the man in the dream. I told myself for the hundredth time that it was a ridiculous fantasy. I couldn't have any real relationship with a mortal. Seth had fallen from grace, and I'd refused him. It was all impossible now.
All things are possible.
Erik and Mei had said it was impossible for Seth to find my soul across the vastness of the dream world - yet he had.
Kristin had told me my contract was airtight - yet Erik had sworn there was a flaw somewhere. He'd died for that knowledge, I was certain.
Seth had claimed nothing could bring him back to Seattle - yet I had.
Everyone who worked for Hell had told me darkened souls almost never redeemed themselves - yet Seth was striving to regain my good opinion. He was also sacrificing what he loved - his writing - to help the family he loved more. Would that be enough? Could he be saved?
All things are possible.
I sat up from the couch, my gaze falling on the spot where Aubrey and Godiva slept next to each other. Godiva had come to me after I'd dreamed her. The dream I still maintained was impossible.
Miracles are real, Georgina. You've just got to lift yourself out of the muck to make them. You've got to take the chance.
Could I? Would I? Was there a miracle somewhere in the muck of this despair, heartache, death, and betrayal? I couldn't see through it. I didn't know where to start. Carter had said change happened through small acts. All I had to do was pick something. Anything. Take the chance.
Again, I focused on Godiva. The man in the dream. Maybe it was Seth. Maybe it wasn't. Maybe I could make it him. His love had been great enough to rescue me and then try to rescue himself. I realized now what had been bothering me. He was doing all of this - how could I do any less? All my life, I'd hidden from hard choices. I'd always found some compromise to avoid bad things, the results of which never really turned out that great. If anything, they'd become worse. My love for Seth was no less than his for me, but I hadn't been willing to do the things that might hurt.
He'd told me there was no way the universe would let us stay apart. He was right - and this time, I would be the one who made sure we came together again. I wouldn't abandon him.
I was moving toward the