Stud Muffin (Donner Bakery #2) - Jiffy Kate Page 0,82

get dressed and run to the grocery store. After that, maybe I’ll stop by Anna and Cole’s and check on the baby.

Maybe I should whip up a quick batch of muffins to take over there?

Yeah, that should do the trick.

It’s only five thirty and I need to keep myself busy. If I don’t, I’ll spend the rest of the night overthinking the last few hours and I don’t want to do that. I promised Cage no weirdness, but I feel my freak out boiling under the surface, just waiting to erupt, so I’m guessing I won’t be able to keep that promise if I don’t get out of the house and out of my damn head.

An hour later, when I walk into Cole and Anna’s house, it’s utter chaos.

Blankets, baby clothes, and diaper cloths are in piles on the floor with random pacifiers strewn about. There’s also fast food bags littering the house and I’m tempted to close the door and check the house number to make sure I’m in the right place.

I’ve never seen Anna’s house like this and to be honest, I’m scared. Is this what having a baby does to you? I mean, I know they need a lot of stuff, but I thought all they did was sleep at this age.

Even though the place is a mess, it’s quiet, so I continue to walk carefully to the kitchen, placing a box of muffins on the only cleared off counter space I can find.

“Hey, you. We’re over here.” I jump at the sound of Anna’s voice and follow it to the living room where I see the most beautiful sight. In the midst of what looks like a detonated bomb’s aftermath is my friend. Her hair looks like a rat’s nest and she has bags under her eyes, but she’s completely in her element as she nurses her son. She looks so calm and happy.

She’s breathtaking.

“Look at you, Mama. You’re a pro at this!” I pick up a stack of folded laundry that’s close to Anna and move it to the coffee table, sitting in its spot.

“Well, I’m obviously not a pro at multitasking but I really don’t care.” Her voice is carefree and I cannot believe this is the same Anna I’ve known all my life. Where’s the uptight, judgmental woman who lovingly bosses me around? It sounds crazy, but I kinda miss her.

“You know I can come over here and help with the house stuff, if you want. I don’t mind.”

She shrugs. “The house will be cleaned one of these days. I can’t believe it’s not bothering me more than it is, but I’m just really enjoying my time with Matthew. Yeah,” she coos, gently stroking his sweet face with the most content smile I’ve ever seen in my life.

“You can hold him after I burp him, if you’d like.”

“Sure.” I smile at her.

If I’m being honest with myself, I thought it would be hard being here, surrounded by baby things, when just a few months ago, it was all I wanted. All I could think about. But I’m okay, I really am. Of course, I still want a baby of my own, but I can wait.

In hindsight, I think I was so obsessed with having a baby because I felt like something was missing in my life, but now, I realize that something was love. True, unconditional love. It’s like my subconscious knew things weren’t good in my marriage long before my conscious mind caught up to speed.

Maybe there were signs.

Maybe I missed them.

Maybe it was intentional.

But now, I’m living life with eyes wide open, and I’m okay with waiting. It’ll happen when it’s supposed to happen. Deep down, I know I’ll be a mom one day and it’ll be the best gift I’ve ever been given. Until then, I’ll just dote on this little bundle of joy.

Reaching out, I sweep my hand gently over his soft head.

“He’s so small,” I whisper. “Are you sure Cole is his daddy?”

Anna chuckles, shaking her head. “Stop.”

While she burps the baby and changes him, I go into her kitchen and grab the box of muffins for us to snack on. I also use the opportunity to start a load of dishes in the dishwasher and wipe down the counters before I return to the living room.

“How about you sit,” Anna instructs once I’m back. “I’ll situate him the way he likes to be held.”

I do as she says and soon I have a precious baby sleeping in