that too close? With all the golfers around here, I figure you’ll have a boyfriend pretty soon.”
“Oh, stuff and nonsense.”
“I’m teasing. I’ll give you a key, how’s that?”
Gillian giggled. “I wasn’t hinting. I know you like your privacy. You’ll be dating…and such.”
His mind went right to Jensen and he rubbed his chest to ease the sharp ache. “I don’t think we need to worry about that. I’ll probably be too busy for dating…and such. The workouts and training don’t stop just because its off-season.”
“How about a vacation? You’re going to need some time off, Clint. You work too hard.”
“Most people would kill for my job, Mom. Don’t worry, though. I’m taking a couple of weeks off to join Joseph and Ten’s search and rescue group.”
“Oh, how nice. That makes me happy.” Gillian beamed as she gazed out over the hills rolling gently down to the lake. “I so want you all to be a family.”
He was trying. “We’re making headway, I think.”
“What will this rescue thing involve?”
“As far as I can tell we’ll go through a period of intense training on everything from first aid to tracking, then I’ll be sent out on some kind of a field test.”
“I guess there’s a demand for that sort of thing.”
‘Oh, yea. Nationwide, Joseph said there’s a need for a unit to be dispatched over four thousand times a year.”
“Wow. With your job, you won’t be able to go very often.”
“No, but I’ll go when I can. Plus, I’m not sure how much longer I’m going to play, Mom. There are plenty of other things I want to do with my life.” One or two more seasons of playing professionally and all of his debt would be history.
“I’m glad to hear that. I worry about you.”
Again, he thought of Jensen and her concerns. They were legitimate, he knew. In fact, there was a running joke inside the NFL that the letters stood for Not For Long. Even if you discounted CTE, injuries were frequent and sometimes devastating. The sport just did a number on your body – another reason he wanted to get out while the getting was good.
As he mused about his future, he could hear his mother yawn. “Why don’t you go on to bed and I’ll lock up.”
“Okay. I am tired. Tomorrow’s going to be a big day.”
“I don’t want you working yourself to death. We could take Bethany out to eat for her birthday.”
“No, I want to have everyone here and show off my house. Cassidy will take care of most of the cooking.”
“Good. Let everyone pitch in and you take it easy.”
“Stop your worrying. I’m fine.” She rose and leaned over to kiss her son. “I know you want a place of your own, but I sure do enjoy having you here with me.”
“Ha! If I stayed, you’d feed me so well I’d be too fat to run the ball down the field.”
“Pooh. That’s not true.” She waved off the idea as she opened the French doors leading straight to her room. “Sleep well, darling.”
“I will. Night, Mama.”
Once he was alone, Clint propped his feet up on the porch railing. The weather was so nice, and the breeze was so enjoyable, he thought he just might sleep right here on the porch. Closing his eyes, he tried not to think about Jensen – but old habits were hard to break. He couldn’t get over how she made him feel. Deep in thought, he raised his hand to his lips. Hell, he could still feel her kiss. The thought of never seeing her again continuously ate at him. He’d even resorted to stalking her on social media, but she rarely posted anything personal.
Torturing himself, Clint relived their last few conversations, recalling every detail of her appearance, the sexy inflection in her voice. Somehow, she was different than before. A bit more fragile. Her demeanor was more subdued. She seemed to have lost some of her previous fire. “I don’t like that.”
In the deepening hours of the night, Clint admitted the truth. He wanted her to be happy. Yes, he was selfish. He’d much rather she be happy with him…but if that wasn’t possible, he still wished her well. His rejection of her offer of friendship might’ve seemed petty at the time, but that was a ruse. Actually, it was an act of self-preservation. He harbored no animosity against her. On the contrary, his feelings for Jensen were deep, real, and lasting. This realization made him sad. Clint knew he