Still not into you - Charlotte Byrd Page 0,43

I knew that it was going to be our last time together. Maybe that’s why I went along with it. Seized the day, so to speak.

I made an unusual discovery this week. I didn’t know how difficult it was to explain why I had a black eye and make someone believe that it was an accident. For some reason, I came up with a ridiculous story—that I fell into a corner of a bookshelf. It seemed so reasonable, but when I ran it by a few people who asked me with a concerned look on their face what had happened, I could tell right away that, though they nodded and said they were sorry, none of them believed me. Luckily, my eye started to heal and fewer and fewer people asked me about it as time passed.

Outside of my roommates, the only people who know the truth about what had happened are Tea and Dr. Greyson. They were the only ones with whom I actually talked about all this in detail and told the truth. When I talked to Tea about it, she acted like a good friend. She didn’t make judgements and she didn’t give me advice. I messed up so much that I’m beyond advice. I don’t want to hear it. I can’t take any of it in. I just want to run away screaming whenever someone (like Juliet) offers it up. Dr. Greyson, on the other hand, isn’t much of an advice giver. When I talked to her, I got the impression that she actually thinks that I secretly want my whole life to fall apart. Like I’m on some sort of mission to destroy my life and I’m not. Not really. At least I hope not.

Honestly, talking about it doesn’t help much. Instead, it makes me feel like I’m dwelling on something that I can never get over or change and that makes me feel like crap. So recently, I’ve come to a decision. I’m not going to talk about it anymore. I’m not even going to think about it. If Hudson doesn’t want to talk about it, then why should I? What’s done is done. It’s over. It was a terrible mistake. All I can do now is try to move on. If only the legal system understood the urgency with which I wanted to move on…

24

The legal system moves at its own pace and it cannot be rushed no matter how hard you try. Dealing with it is an exercise in patience. What I find out from Dylan and later confirm on my own by researching the topic online is that an annulment is incredibly difficult to get in the state of New York.

I’ve heard the word “annulment” many times before, but I didn’t actually know what it meant. Apparently, an annulment is a finding by a court that a marriage is invalid or void and this finding allows the court to make it as if the marriage never occurred. This is what both Dylan and I want, but it doesn’t look like it’s something that can happen.

“I can’t believe that we can’t get an annulment,” I say. Dylan is sitting on the couch texting someone.

“We’ve been over this already,” he says without looking up.

“I know,” I sigh. “But what if…”

“Look, here, let me read it to you,” he says, cutting me off.

He already told me this and I read a lot about it already online, but I still feel like there must be a way. Dylan searches for something on his phone and clears his throat.

“There are various grounds that allow either spouse to bring the action to annul the marriage,” Dylan reads. “These are the grounds. Either spouse had not reached the age of legal consent, eighteen years of age. That doesn’t apply to us.”

I nod.

“Either spouse is incurably incapable of having sexual intercourse. Either spouse has incurable insanity for at least five years after marriage. Either spouse could not give actual consent to the marriage (could not understand the effect, nature, and the consequences of marriage).”

“Oh, that’s us!” I say. “We were drunk. We didn’t actually understand the effect and consequences of marriage.”

“You didn’t let me finish,” Dylan says. “Either spouse could not give actual consent to the marriage, could not understand the nature, effect, and consequences of marriage, as a result of some mental incapacity or deficiency.”

“We were drunk,” I say.

“That’s not a mental incapacity,” he says.

“Are you serious? We got married and didn’t remember. If that’s not a mental