Spotlight by Eden Finley Page 0,90
image or becoming a different person. It’s becoming someone I don’t want to be if I don’t have the nerve to say no.
So instead, I say no to everything.
Healthy.
After Kaylee goes to bed on Monday evening, I wait until I see the brat and his entourage leave before I go into Ryder’s studio.
I find him slumped over the desk in the control room. “Rough day?”
He startles, but when he turns to look at me, his face immediately relaxes. “It just got a million times better.”
“Because the brat left?” I step closer.
Ryder reaches for me. “Because you’re here.”
He pulls me on top of him, and I straddle his thighs awkwardly on the chair. He cups the back of my head and then leans up to meld his mouth with mine.
With the need I have for his lips, his touch, and his kisses, I’m able to ignore the fact I’m almost falling off his lap, the armrest is digging into my side, and my leg is almost cramping from trying to hold me up.
Ryder’s tongue moves slowly against mine.
When he moans, it’s almost enough to make me forget what I came in here to say.
Almost.
Still, it’s hard to find the right words. Swallowing my pride is hard.
Ryder pulls back and stares up at me like he knows I’m struggling. “Everything okay?”
I bury my head in his neck and kiss his skin as I murmur, “You’re right.”
His hand freezes in the middle of my back. “In general, or about something in particular?”
I laugh. “Oh, definitely something in particular. You’re wrong about almost everything else.”
He pinches my side, and I climb off his lap.
Ryder leans back in his chair as I pull over another seat.
I look him in his knowing blue eyes. “I fight everything mainstream because of my father, not because I don’t like it.”
He at least has the respect to try to hold back his smile. Even if he fails miserably.
I sigh. “I’m going to send my demo to a few labels.”
His face lights up until he realizes, while this is a move in the right direction, it’s still not going his way. “You’re still not giving it to Harley.” Ryder’s pouty lips thin into a flat line.
“I understand everything you were getting at with him, but with us being … us, it makes me uncomfortable.”
“Okay then, I’m breaking up with you.”
My heart sinks. Did he really just say that? “W-what?”
He puts his hand on my thigh. “Oh my God, I’m so sorry. I thought you’d know I was joking.”
I shove him. “Asshole.”
“I really am sorry,” he says softly. “I support you no matter what you do, and I’m proud of you for putting yourself out there.”
I narrow my eyes. “But …”
“But what?”
“Sounds like there was going to be a but coming.”
Ryder grits his teeth. “Do not make a joke about coming in butts,” he mutters to himself.
“So glad we can have this completely serious, grown-up conversation about something as important as my career.”
“You’re welcome.” He beams. “But fine. What I was going to say was that I know Harley. I know how much he complained about Joystar and how they made us write all those shallow songs. He worked like hell to get out of his contract with them for the same reason. When he says he’s building a label where his artists get to sing and do what they want, I know he’ll be fair. Try those other labels, sure, but don’t write Harley off because of me.”
“I-I’ll think about it.” I don’t see myself going in that direction, but he’s right. I shouldn’t write him off without exploring it first.
He leans in and kisses my cheek. “That’s all I’m asking.”
I let out a loud breath, not realizing how relieved I am that this conversation didn’t end in another fight.
Ryder must sense it because his brow scrunches. “Did you think that was going to go differently?”
“Maybe?” I slump. “I’m sorry. I … I don’t know if we’re cool. Things have been weird, and—”
“If this is going to work between us, we have to accept the fact we’re going to have disagreements.”
I nod. “A lot of them.”
“Yeah, a lot of them. But as long as we know we’re both in this, and we talk, and we’re respectful, everything will be okay between us. Always.”
“Okay.”
“Can you stay tonight?” Ryder asks.
“I really want to, but I should go. I have Chase tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow’s Tuesday.”
“I know.” I smile. “I did tell you Chord and Brenna had an event coming up where I’d have Chase an