Sparks - Wendy Higgins Page 0,97

will be okay,” I whispered to myself.

My phone whistled, and I felt that familiar thrum of anticipation, wondering what Shawn would say now. It was probably a picture. But it wasn’t Shawn; it was a text from a non-contact.

Are you happy? He’s all yours now. How does it feel to ruin a family?

The Charlotte area code. Natalie. Bile slipped up my throat and I couldn’t swallow it. I just sat there staring at the screen, my stomach twisting. I wanted to point out that they were already in a bad place when he met me, but it would be insensitive to rebut when her world was falling apart. Plus, she was right. I did have a part in ruining their family and that’s something I’d have to live with. I could apologize, but something told me she wouldn’t be receptive to forgiveness right now, and rightly so. I didn’t answer.

I’d been planning to go back out and get a sandwich from the place down the street, but there was no way I’d be able to eat now. I dropped my phone on the duvet and sat very still, willing the sickening sensation to leave. And then my phone whistled again. I slowly reached for it.

What kind of woman talks a drunk soldier into giving out his CO’s number and then STALKS HIM AND SEDUCES HIM WHEN HE’S ENGAGED?

What? CO meant commanding officer. I stared at her message for a good long while, reading it over and over, holding my breath in disbelief. I hadn’t thought to wonder what Shawn told her about how we met, but this was not what I’d expected. He’d completely thrown me under the bus, allowing her to believe I’d seduced him and taken advantage of him. The poor, lonely military guy away from his family. This text, this lie that he’d told about me, caused me to see him differently for the first time. Every memory of us was suddenly discolored. The gentleness and understanding I’d felt for him since day one turned to something harder and sharper. This lie was the cap on a vial of poison.

After snapping a screenshot, I made a decision not to respond, and instead blocked her. My resolve was speedy. If I responded, attempting to defend myself, she wouldn’t believe me anyway. If that lie granted any peace for the two of them, for the sake of their son, I would allow her to believe the lie about me. But I was done with this situation.

I texted the screenshot to Shawn. Almost immediately his number popped up on my screen, calling me. I pressed the red button to ignore it. He texted me instead.

Fuck. Please block her so she doesn’t keep bothering you. I’m so sorry.

Already blocked, I told him.

Can we talk? Please let me call you.

My fingers sped across the screen, my breathing ragged. No. I really, really don’t want to talk to you right now. You lied about me. It makes me question everything.

Were things ever actually “over” between them? Or had he been giving me lip service so we could get more intimate? I let out a dry laugh of disbelief at my own needy gullibility.

I can’t believe this is happening. Harlow, I had to make something up. Please understand. We were trying to work things out and it would have made things so much worse if I told her what really happened.

I understand, I told him. And I truly did. I’m not even angry right now, Shawn. Just shell-shocked. This is not a situation I want to be in anymore.

No. I’m begging you. Just take some time to think about it.

I don’t need any time after all. We are over.

I pressed Send, and in that moment I felt a rush of freedom and clarity. The guilt left me. Natalie would always be in his life because of their connection with Bennett. And I couldn’t pretend that his lie about me hadn’t broken the trust I felt. I might always wonder if he was being truthful.

You hate me, don’t you? he asked. There was that question again. He wanted so desperately for me to have a good opinion of him.

I thought about it and answered truthfully. No hate. I wish you well. But I’m not going to let you hurt me anymore. I’m blocking your number and you need to respect my space.

Wait, Harlow. For what it’s worth I’m sorry. I’ve never been sorrier. Even now, you should be calling me a fucking asshole but you’re