Sparks - Wendy Higgins Page 0,48

I need, actually. Can you fly down?”

I laughed. “If only.”

“Let’s just say I didn’t get a hug good-bye when she left today. Pretty much the only person I get any affection from is Bennett. It’s been an embarrassingly long time since Natalie touched me.”

“Really?” I felt my face scrunching in disbelief.

“Yeah. Long time.” He cleared his throat. I could tell he was reluctant to talk about it, but at the same time needed to say it. “She’s always tired from traveling, or not feeling well. Or when we’re at her parents’ house we can’t touch unless her parents are sleeping. And by the time they’re asleep she’s usually asleep too.”

“Yikes.” How could she not want to jump this man’s bones? Relationships were so baffling. People used to wonder the same thing about me and Don. “You don’t think there’s another man, do you?”

“No, I really don’t. She’s one of those very independent women who doesn’t need a man at all.”

“Got it,” I said.

We were both quiet for a long moment. Talking to Shawn always filled me with conflicting emotions. The more we talked the more it felt right, and that scared me. A sense of wrongness overwhelmed me at that realization as I thought of his fiancé and what the two of them were dealing with.

“Shawn…we shouldn’t be doing this.” He started to talk, but I rushed forward. “I mean it. What if our friendship, or whatever this is, gets in the way of you guys being able to grow closer and work it out?”

“Honestly, Harlow, even before I met you we were growing farther and farther apart every day.”

I bit my lip. “I just feel really bad when I think about her.”

He was quiet for a moment. “You’re a good person. You’re sweet and kind to worry. But I promise, me talking to you is not interfering in me and Nat working things out.”

I didn’t know what to say to that, but I hated the melancholy in his voice, like he hadn’t been treated with gentleness or nurtured in a long while. Was I judging her? I didn’t want to. I rubbed my face.

“So. How’s Sparks treating you?”

I groaned. “It’s awful.”

“Why? What’s happened since we last talked?”

“Nothing.” I covered my eyes even though he couldn’t see me. “I totally don’t want to talk about it. The dating world is just a really big disaster for someone like me.”

“What does that mean, someone like you?”

“Someone who actually wants to get to know someone and have a relationship, not just hook up.”

“Ah. Well, don’t lower your standards for anyone, Harlow. Don’t ever settle.”

I smiled, though I felt a little sad. “Thanks.”

“You probably have to get up early, huh?”

“Yeah. Kind of.” I wanted to keep talking, but I couldn’t say that.

“Maybe we can talk while I’m in Japan? The time difference is brutal but I’m up a lot during the night anyway.”

“I’d like that a lot.” I smiled and felt all squishy.

“Awesome.” His voice had that laughing quality to it that I loved, like I could hear his smile through his words. “All right then, Harlow Robinson. You take care.”

“You too, Shawn Fowler.”

“Night.”

“Good night,” I whispered.

I dropped my phone and rubbed my forehead. It would be a while before I’d fall asleep.

I didn’t acknowledge any weirdness between Silas and I the next day. And there seemed to be no awkwardness on his part anyhow. Business and friendship as usual. But my mind was lost in Shawnland.

The day he left for Japan also happened to be my payday. Yes!! We texted each other all day as I ran my errands and he packed then went to the airport. We sent pictures of every ridiculous thing along the way—my grocery cart filled with veggies, his luggage, my face sipping afternoon tea that Cheryl had made, his face drinking a vodka tonic at the Omega Skies lounge at his local airport. I couldn’t stop smiling.

That Friday night I was curled up on the couch with Cheryl watching snow flurries fall outside the window onto the brick and steel alleyway outside when Willa and Holly came in. They both shivered when they hit the warmth of the apartment, and I watched with satisfaction as their eyes landed on the coffee table where I’d made a spread to greet them.

“What is all this?” Holly asked, surveying the cheese board.

“Girl, is that sangria?” Willa’s eyes were wide as she stared at the pitcher with fruit floating on top. I puffed with pride.

“Yep. Take a load off girls. We’re