Sparks - Wendy Higgins Page 0,35

Willy. Dingaling. Knob, as the Brits say. I moved the phone sideways and tilted my head. Out of context a prick was a funny looking thing.

I wasn’t turned on. Should I be? I mean, it was an impressive third leg, but I wanted more than that. Not more shaft, that would be plenty. More of the man. Was there something wrong with me? The picture was just so impersonal. And then I asked myself, Self, how would you feel if Shawn sent you that peter pic?

Yeah. Self would be horny. Because of the person and personality attached to the manhood.

I took a screen shot of the schlong, and then unmatched with him without responding. It was cowardly. I wondered if I should have told him off or reported him, but what would it change? Some girls wanted that, and good for them. Really, I meant that. To each his own. But if a guy made the bold move of sending an unsolicited woody pic, then he took the chance of freaking someone out and getting the disappearing act.

I inhaled deeply and let it out before moving back to my inbox. No more weenie meat swords.

Okay, that one made me giggle out loud.

There was a reply from Dean, the lawyer, AKA my friend without benefits.

Dean! I got my first dick pic!

I’m going to venture a guess and say it was unsolicited?

Yes. I deleted him. But I feel officially initiated into online dating now.

Lol. Welcome to the club, new girl. Does this mean you’re open to nudes, then?

No! I sent the crying-laughing emoji and he sent back the bawling-tears one, which made me giggle.

Well, he wrote. If you ever want to try out your photography skills to see what it’s like to send them, I’ll be your guinea pig.

You’ll take one for the team? How valiant. I was smiling.

Ever the nobleman, at your service.

I shook my head, still grinning, and went to his photos again. Handsome Wall Street type. Smooth. Smart. If a girl wanted a one-night stand, he could probably make it worth her while…

I sighed and left his profile, going back into my messages.

The fireman, Ren. His message to me was simple. One word.

Gorgeous.

He was a big, sexy man with dark hair and scruff on his cheeks. Barrel chest. Not skinny at all. The kind of man that made a thick girl feel small. Me likey. But the thing I liked most about Ren was that he wasn’t perfect. He had a small scar under one eye, and his teeth were the tiniest bit crooked, but that didn’t keep him from giving a huge all-American smile. It gave him even more character.

Hi handsome, I said, wondering how cheesy my pathetic attempt at flirting would seem. And then I tacked on: I love your smile!

I next messaged back the grad student from NYU who’d told me good morning. He had huge brown eyes that dipped down at the corners and gave him a chill look.

Good morning back! What are you up to today?

The NYU student wrote right back. Studying. Then hitting the gym. Want to join me?

At the gym? I asked. I’m not really a gym girl. But I like to take walks and do pilates at home.

Within seconds of sending my response his profile and our message thread disappeared. What the…? I clicked around and blinked at my phone. Did he just ghost me? What a prick! Excuse me for not being a gym rat! Indignance and hurt rose up automatically and I took a couple deep breaths to squash it down. He was a stranger. He wanted a certain type of girl. That was his prerogative. No use getting offended by it.

Thanks. The message popped up from Ren, the big sexy fireman. He was in Elizabeth, New Jersey, which wasn’t far. I bit my lip when I saw the three dots appear, notifying me that he was typing. Then he said: Flight attendant, huh? We should get together n trade stories. I bet you got some good ones.

Okay, his grammar wasn’t stellar, but I could handle that to an extent.

Yeah, you put out real fires and I put out the hypothetical kind, lol.

Lmao. People r assholes. I can’t imagine the shit they put u thru.

It’s good for the most part, I admitted. I guess it has its bad moments like any job. But you get to be a hero and face real danger, so thanks for that.

Anything for the people.

“Awwww!”

“What’d you say?” Beth called from the living room, startling