The Sophomore (College Years #2) - Monica Murphy Page 0,61
this down.
“Dude, just spit it out,” Eli says impatiently.
“We hooked up.”
More silence as Eli absorbs what I just said.
“Really? How was it? Did you fuck her? Please tell me you didn’t fuck her,” Eli says, keeping his gaze on the road.
“I didn’t fuck her. But we did other stuff.” I don’t need to go into detail.
“Damn bro. I never thought you’d actually go for it.” He shakes his head. “How was it?”
It’s none of his damn business, but I guess I need to give him something. “It was—good.”
“Want more?”
“Yes. No. I don’t know.” I shrug. “I don’t normally return for seconds. Or if I do, it’s only because I know I’ll never see her again.”
“You’re probably going to see Ellie a lot over the next few years,” Eli reminds me.
“I know,” I say miserably, hating that I sound so down and out. “I fucked up.”
“Maybe. Maybe not,” Eli says.
“What do you mean?”
“Keep it light. Keep it casual. See what happens. Ellie might be down. She’s eager to take any bit of attention you toss her way, I know that,” Eli explains.
“You make her sound desperate,” I say, my voice edged with steel. I don’t like hearing him talk about her like that. “She’s not.”
He actually laughs, the fucker. “Simmer down. I’m not knocking your girl. I’m just stating facts. This is a girl who’s been worshiping the Jackson Rivers shrine for a long ass time. She’ll do whatever she can to keep you.”
“Eli, what the fuck are you saying? I don’t want to string her along. She’s the serious type. You know this,” I point out.
“Right. You’re right. But she might be the nonserious type too. You’ll never know until you talk to her.” He turns onto Shaw Avenue and we’re only minutes from the restaurant. “I say you go for it.”
“Are you giving me permission?”
“If that’s what you need, then yes.” He grins. “Do it. Do her. Do her all night long, for as many nights as possible. Let it happen. See where it takes you.”
“If Ava heard you say this about her best friend, she’d kick your ass,” I remind him.
The look of terror on Eli’s face almost makes me laugh. “You can’t tell her. She’ll kill me.”
“You’d deserve to be killed.” I finally do laugh, but it’s brief. “I can’t use Ellie like that.”
Eli exhales, shaking his head. “I know. I was just talking out my ass. She’s a good girl, Jackson.”
“I know. She’s one of the best.” The absolute best. So responsive. So pretty. So sweet. All mine.
Yeah, no. Those last two words don’t apply. Well, they do. She could be all mine. All I have to do is say the words and I could make it happen.
Egotistical of me to think, but it’s true. She wants me.
Damn it, I want her too.
Could I keep it casual with Ellie? Probably not. She’d be in way too deep. She probably already is.
The problem? I don’t want pressure and commitment. I just want more.
More Ellie.
Eighteen
Ellie
I’ve walked around in an orgasm-induced fog for much of the day. Silly, right? Jackson makes me come once and I can’t stop thinking about it. How perfect the moment was—at least for me. I’m sure it would’ve been better if he’d let me do something for him, but of course, typical me, I was too scared to push.
As I go about my day, I become more and more confident. I’m not even mad that he slipped out of my bed God knows when and didn’t leave a note or text me. He hasn’t texted me all day. And that’s all right. I’m cool with it. I’ll see him again tonight, when he picks me up after work, and then…
Then I’ll jump him.
I’m downright giddy at the thought.
I take the bus from campus back home after class so I can get ready for work. I really miss my car. Maybe I should text Jackson and ask if he’s talked to the mechanic yet? I don’t want to seem pushy…
Ugh, I hate how I second-guess myself.
Entering my apartment, I find my roommate Alaina sitting on the couch, watching TV. She glances in my direction when she hears the door open, her face lighting up.
“Ellie! Hey, hi!”
I shut and lock the door before I turn to face her, confused by her enthusiasm. She’s been the least friendly of my three new roommates. Not that she’s been mean or anything, but she hasn’t been especially nice either.