The Sophomore (College Years #2) - Monica Murphy Page 0,24
matter of fact. I see the sympathy in her gaze and it’s reassuring. “I’ve been there. I feel you.”
“What will be great is you won’t give him any of that. Not an ounce of fangirl behavior. You will ignore him,” Hayden says.
“I will?”
“Yes.” She nods. “Ignore him the entire night, but make sure you’re always standing nearby. Close to him, but not too close. Always in his peripheral.”
This sounds silly. Why avoid him, but also make sure he can see me?
“Don’t frown. This kind of shit works,” Gracie says.
“It’s just a bunch of game playing,” I say, throwing my hands up. “I don’t like playing games. I’m more the straightforward type.”
“Yeah, but that’s not how it’s done. Look.” Hayden comes to me, grabbing my shoulders and gently turning me so I have to face her. “I hate playing games too. Not every relationship has to be that way. And yes, there are people out there, that’s all they do. But sometimes, you have to work the system to your advantage. You have to play the game for a little bit. You need to do that with Jackson, if you want to be with him.”
“I don’t know if I want to be with him,” I say, my voice soft. Almost as if it doesn’t exist.
That’s how I feel when it comes to him. Online, on the phone, whatever, I exist. I’m in his world. In reality? Face to face? He runs. Avoids. Or says something shitty to make me run and avoid.
It sucks.
“Then maybe you shouldn’t respond to him at all,” Hayden says. “Maybe Gracie is right. You should ignore him.”
“I don’t know what I want,” I admit with a sigh.
My phone buzzes again and I glance down at it to find another text from Jackson.
I’ll be there. I want to talk to you.
“Oh. My God!” Gracie squeals when she sees it. “Maybe something will happen between you two tonight.”
“Do not get my hopes up,” I warn her.
“Yeah, G. You know how he is,” Hayden adds.
Ouch.
Oh well, it’s true.
“Tell him you’ll be there with your new friend and leave it at that,” Gracie encourages as I tap out my response.
Me: Hey! Yes, I’ll be there with my new friend. Can’t wait to see you.
I read the reply out loud before sending it.
“Get rid of the last part,” Gracie says.
I erase it and send this instead: Hey, yes, I’ll be there with my friend.
“Better,” Hayden says with a nod.
“He’s already typing,” I tell them, staring at the screen. That little gray bubble sits there forever, driving me mad with curiosity. Gracie resumes choosing Hayden’s outfit for the night as they discuss Franz the German and how much Gracie hopes he’s down for a make-out sesh.
Jackson: Hopefully you’ll get a chance to talk to me. I miss you.
I read his words out loud.
“Do not tell him you miss him! Don’t do it!” Hayden is practically screaming.
“I won’t, I promise.” I tap at the phone. Erase letters. Rewrite my sentence. God, it’s the worst.
Me: See you later!
That’s all I say.
And I think that’s enough.
The party is in full swing by the time Carson shows up, and we’re only about an hour in. I run to him the moment I spot him, the two friends he brought with him looking at me with shock on their faces. I don’t know what their deal is, but I give Carson a big hug, and he very carefully wraps his arms around me before they spring away from my body.
“I’m so glad you made it,” I say with way too much enthusiasm.
I might’ve had a couple of White Claws. So I’m buzzin’.
“We almost didn’t show,” Carson admits with an embarrassed smile. “These two didn’t want to come.” He jerks his thumb toward his friends standing behind him.
“What are your names?” I ask them, swaying a little bit on my feet. I need to keep my stuff together. Not act like a drunken fool.
“I’m Jonah,” one of them says.
“Danny,” says the other.
“Jonah and Danny, don’t crush your friend’s spirit,” I tell them, wagging my finger in their direction. “Let’s go find drinks for you guys.”
I lead them into the throng of people crowding the living room, making our way to the kitchen where all the alcohol is. Once we’re in there, the crowd lightens up a bit, and I find Tony sitting at the counter on a barstool, Hayden standing in between his spread legs with her arms around his neck.