obvious shortcomings which are huge and glaring, and I’m ready to throw someone away because he didn’t walk me to my car. The problem is, I still think I’m right about that. I want to shake Katie. I want to tell her she is so much better than Mike. She’s a smart, successful woman, and she doesn’t have to put up with this schmuck. I find myself becoming angry with her for not valuing herself more highly. But I swallow the need to voice those opinions along with a sip of ice water from my glass on the table.
“I think I’d like to get the check now,” Katie says.
I offer to pay for lunch. It’s the least I can do. Katie protests meekly, before letting me. Then we walk together through the heavy summer heat to our cars. “Is he going to be there when you get home?” I ask.
She shakes her head, her expression distant and dazed. “No, he took his kids to a water park today. He won’t be back until dinner.”
I touch her arm to get her attention. “This isn’t your fault. If Mike is scared to get married, he should have talked to you about it. Going behind your back with one of your friends is not the way to deal with cold feet. I’m sorry. I really am. For the record, if you knew something like this about a man I intended to marry and you didn’t tell me, I’d be mad as hell at you.” I don’t know why I say all this to her. I’m letting her reaction to the news get to me.
Katie eyes me silently, her expression grim and watery.
“Come home with me,” I suggest.
She shakes her head. “Oh, no. Thanks.”
“Are you sure? We can talk more or not talk. Whatever you want.”
She jingles her keys in her hand. “I really need to go home and be by myself for a while.”
“Okay.” I don’t want to let her leave. Whether it’s welcome or not, I reach out and hug her. Her response is weak, but she returns the gesture. Then I have no choice but to watch as she mechanically gets in her car and drives away.
“I just told her.”
“How did she take it?” Mom asks.
I’m sitting in my car holding my cell phone to my ear. The car is sweltering after sitting in the midday sun. I have the air-conditioning blowing full-blast, but the interior is slow to cool, and I can feel the sweat dripping down and pooling at my lower back. “She seemed shell-shocked,” I reply. “She didn’t get angry, just sad and kind of dazed. I asked if I’d done the right thing by telling her and do you know what she said?”
“What?”
“She said, ‘What if he wants to leave me?’ She’s afraid of him leaving her?”
“You don’t think she’d leave him over this?” Mom asks.
“I don’t know. I mentioned that and she seemed shocked at the idea. How could she rather not know? Does she want to marry the same type of guy she just divorced?”
“Maybe you should have stayed out of it.”
I feel tears threatening again. “How could I? How could I keep seeing them together, knowing what he’s doing, the way he’s making a fool out of her?”
“I don’t know, honey.”
“I bet she says nothing to him. I bet she pretends we never had this conversation and goes on like nothing happened.”
“If she does, it’s none of your business. You did what you had to. You told her. What she does now is her own decision.”
I sink into the car seat. “Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything. I wish Bryn had never told me.”
“She really isn’t a friend to either of you. She shouldn’t have put you in that position.”
“I should have spent more time considering not telling Katie. I always follow my moral compass with this arrogant self-assurance.”
Mom laughs. “You do have this habit of always thinking you’re right.”
“And you don’t?” I counter.
“Well, you might have gotten that from me,” she answers. I can hear the smile in her voice. “Andrea, there is no right or wrong here. You were trying to be a good friend. Don’t beat yourself up about it.”
“What now? Should I call her later to see if she’s okay?”
“That would be a nice thing to do.”
The car is beginning to cool off now. Having Mom tell me that I haven’t done anything wrong feels like the weight of the world lifting off my shoulders. I generally trust her judgment.