his tone; to have him act like the brother I’m missing. But he doesn’t understand. I need to get to Silas. He’ll know what to do; his people will have ways to help. They’re powerful. They’ll be able to help me get my mother back. And once we’re in the Conclave it won’t matter about the log book, or poor Ely. We’ll be hidden from everyone.
I look at Kirin and nod my head, making myself look small and sorry. He smiles at me gently, and walks across the room to sit beside me on the thin pallet. He puts a brotherly arm around me and I lean into him briefly.
“I’m sorry,” I say. “I’m sorry I’ve let you down.”
“Don’t—” he begins. Then I elbow him in the stomach and run. I slam the door behind me and turn the key in the lock. I’m at the front door before he starts banging, across the threshold and racing through the village. I hear the shouts of soldiers behind me as I dash towards Silas’s hut, but I don’t stop, speeding past every hut and cottage until I get to his.
“Silas!” I call, throwing the door wide. “Si—”
No more than half an hour can have passed since I left him. He said he’d come to me in an hour. There had been a nest of blankets on the floor. But now there is nothing. Not even an old candle stub. The hut is completely empty; it’s as if he was never here. It’s all right, I remind myself as fear makes my stomach clench; he must have packed and taken his things with him, to send the message. He’s probably on his way to meet me—
“Oh, Errin,” a voice says slowly, dripping with triumph. I spin and find myself face to face with Chanse Unwin.
“I knew you’d come back here, if that wet behind the ears boy soldier gave you half a chance,” he says, standing in the doorway, blocking the exit. “He’s gone, your lover. I saw him after I left you. Heading out towards the Long Road. Did he not say goodbye?”
No. He wouldn’t. He wouldn’t do that. He said we were friends. He said we were more.
You don’t know what you’ve done, he said.
Yes, I do. I let him trick me. Because he pretended to like me. I never knew him at all. Gods, he spent moons lying to me, hiding himself from me. Using me.
I am a fool.
I lean against the wall, using it to hold me up as my insides shred themselves. I have to bend, the ache behind my ribs blossoming, filling me, crushing my lungs and making it impossible to breathe. What am I going to do? They’ve taken Mama, and I … I need him. How could he do this?
In the doorway, Unwin laughs. “You must think I was born yesterday,” he says, resting against the door frame. “I know every inch of this village. My village. Do you think I didn’t know he was squatting in here, like a beast? Do you think it went unnoticed? I knew. I was biding my time.”
My eyes narrow. I don’t believe him, and my left eyebrow creeps up to let him know it.
“You wouldn’t understand my reasons,” he roars, his face turning purple. “You don’t understand anything, you stupid girl. I was kind to you. I looked out for you. I would have taken care of you. But no. I’m not good enough for you. Little Miss High and Mighty from Tremayne.” His head tilts as he examines me and my jaw tightens in anger. “Look at you,” he continues. “You’re not even that pretty.”
“If you lay a hand on me—”
“Ha!” He cuts me off with a bark of laughter. “I wouldn’t piss on you if you were on fire. Not now. Not now I know you’re soiled goods. I told you, I saw it. Last night. You and him, cavorting around the village. Him with no shirt on, chasing you into the bushes. Then you outside my house, helping him cover himself up. I’m not surprised he left. Why keep the cow once you’ve drunk your fill of the milk?”
The candle in the window of the House of Justice. He was awake, and watching. But he didn’t see the golems, I realize. Then he steps towards me, and I move back instinctively. “I don’t care what you saw,” I say.
He smirks. “I thought about offering to be your guardian, you know. Making you my ward.