green eyes. “Or you can wrap it around my neck and choke the life out of me.”
“Oh.”
“You see?”
I nod. I wish we weren’t here. I wish we were still in the hotel, days ago. Before I knew anything, when I could still stroke the soft skin of his scars and wonder.
“So, do you want to try it?” Leo says, as if suggesting I string a daisy chain.
My fingers go limp. “You want me to try and choke you?” The enchanted ivy falls to the ground.
Leo looks at me, as if I’ve not quite understood the purpose of this place. “Goldie.” His voice drops. “You do realize that Everwhere is teeming with soldiers tonight. It’s not only for you and your sisters that they’ve come—every month on the first-quarter moon . . .”
I glance at his hands resting on the trunk. I want to reach out, to ask Leo to hold me.
“Think of Teddy,” he says. “If you don’t do this, you won’t stand a chance against your father.”
I have no choice, I realize. This is my fate. I cannot escape it. So I nod and, with great effort, draw myself up.
“All right then,” I say lightly, as if I too am only talking about making a daisy chain. “Let’s give it a shot.”
Bea
Bea is the wind through the trees, she’s the light of the moon, the breath of the birds. She imagines her sisters walking on the rocks and moss far below. Up in the heavens the white leaves don’t fall, which leads her to wonder exactly where they come from.
Is Dr. Finch still calling her name? Well, he can wait. She might return. She might not. For now, Bea is lighter than air, swifter than moonlight, stronger than any superhero. She thinks again of the blackbird illustration that could have been drawn for her. It strikes Bea how ordinary flying feels. How natural, how normal. When was the last time she felt this way? When was the last time she flew?
I was going to fly away, Bea thinks, as she soars over the highest tips of the tallest trees. I was going to fly to Everwhere and never return to Earth. The thought slows her down so she’s gliding, drifting on warm currents of air. Bea thinks of Vali, of what she took from him, of how he’ll never experience this. Sorrow and guilt flush her lungs with her next breath and sit heavy in her chest.
Slowly, Bea sinks from the heavens to float below the tops of the trees. Soon she’s so close to the ground that her feet graze the bleached stones. She tries to shake the thoughts from her head, to dislodge the feelings from her heart. She points her nose to the moon, kicks her legs as if trying to restart a playground swing, urging herself up.
Fingers wrap around her booted ankle. Bea glances down to see Dr. Finch below reaching up, pulling her down.
“Let go!” She kicks him off. She wants to be airborne again, untethered, unshackled, unbound. She wants to be flying; she wants to be free. Dr. Finch catches hold of her ankle again. “What the fuck are you doing?”
“I want to show you something.” His grip tightens. “You can mess about later.”
I’m not messing about, Bea thinks. The rest of my life, that was messing about. This is the only thing I want to be real, the only thing I want to be true.
“Let go! Let me go!”
He tugs her down. “Come on.”
“Piss off!” She thinks again of Vali, of how she must be careful, must control herself lest she hurt someone else. “Okay, okay.”
Bea alights onto the mossy ground.
Dr. Finch takes her hand. “Let me show you something beautiful.”
But what could be more beautiful than flying?
“All right then.” Bea tells herself to be kinder, more grateful, more gracious. “But let’s be quick.”
And they begin to walk side by side along the path again.
Liyana
So this is how I’m going to die: at the hands of Mazmo Muzenda-Kasteni. Everything returns in the flood of water into her lungs—her sisters, the soldiers, the eternal fight. She remembers it all. But too late.
Death is a shocking thought, a sobering thought. It isn’t how Liyana imagined she’d die, and she certainly didn’t think it would be so soon. As Liyana thrashes in the water, she thinks of Aunt Nya, of Kumiko, of her sisters. Arms flailing, eyes stinging, lungs exploding, she thinks her goodbyes.