“I’m s-sorry,” I stammered. “I didn’t know who to trust. I found it—”
“Hush!” she said, turning her attention to the crowd.
Inspector Han returned to speaking to a young peasant who had an A-frame jigae loaded on his back, piled high with firewood. He was the focus of the inspector’s sharp gaze, I realized. Not me.
“Why did you go into the shed?” Inspector Han asked.
“I went up to collect brushwood and caught an odd smell,” the peasant replied. “I looked in and saw it.”
“Do you often venture onto Mount Nam to collect brushwood?”
“I do, Inspector.”
“But you did not encounter the smell before?”
“I never went so far as the shed before.”
“And why today?”
“The days have grown cold, and I wanted to collect as much wood as possible. Before the frost settles in.”
While the questioning continued, I crept by and made my way to the empty kitchen. No one had discovered the robe. I was still safe. For now.
I rested my forehead against the wall and let my heart thunder as the image of Inspector Han filled my mind, his large shoulders and brute strength hidden under his silk robe, his calloused and veiny hands never too far from his sword, his almost lifeless eyes that had sunk into his face over the past few weeks, like a man so obsessed over a case that he always forgot to eat and rest.
I finally dared myself to wonder: What if Inspector Han is my brother?
I stepped back from the whirring emotions and observed the coincidences laid out before me. The similar amber eyes, the burn mark in a similar spot to my brother’s, and the similarity in timeline—both orphans, both had come to Hanyang over a decade ago. But one crucial link to tie all the coincidences together was missing: I could not have simply ended up in the same region, the same police bureau, at the very same time as my brother, who had been missing for twelve years.
Besides, if Brother were alive and had lived this long, he would have kept his promise to me. That he would write to me, wherever I might end up in the kingdom. He was not one to break promises.
“Not my brother,” I said aloud, and hearing those words comforted me. “Never my brother.”
* * *
No one was outside the servants’ quarter. Unlocking my personal chest, I opened the lid and saw two things. The inspector’s blue robe was still there, the silk swimming in the darkness. I also saw the norigae pendant. The amber terrapin stared at me from the corner of its eye, and the long blue tassel of silk strings swayed as I picked it up. The colors around me—the white wallpaper, the yellow floor, the slice of pale blue sky outside the door—seemed to bleed together until everything was a blur, nothing vivid, except for the norigae dangling from my finger.
Whether you are the sun, the earth, or the moon, you are a capable girl.
To me.
I wanted to shut out the echo of Inspector Han’s voice. I threw the pendant back in, slammed the lid shut, but I knew it was still there. Whispering to me, condemning me. I walked out of the servants’ quarter and returned with a dirty cloth from the backyard. It was large enough to fill the chest, so that if anyone opened the lid, they would be too repulsed to dig any deeper.
For now, this would do. I couldn’t risk moving the robe in broad daylight.
I paused before shutting the lid. Reaching into the depths, past the fabric, my fingers smoothed themselves over the terrapin again. The moment I drew it out again, memories reached into my mind like beams of light that wrapped their arms around me, echoing with memories.
There aren’t too many like you, Damo Seol. Man or woman.
I squeezed my fingers over the object and imagined throwing it into the rushing water. Or over a cliff. I must have imagined this scene over and over again, for by the time I blinked back to reality, the courtyard hummed with busy steps of servants returning for their midday meals.
“Seol.”
I snatched the pendant close and slammed the lid shut. Slipping the norigae quickly into my uniform, I whirled around to see Aejung frowning at me.
“You look so sick!”
“What do you want?” I snapped.
She pursed her lips. “Why is everyone so unkind these days?” She turned to stalk off but stopped herself, remembering why she’d come for me. “You are summoned by Inspector Han to the main