their best young military minds were being taken to far more safety than they could possibly have in Hyderabad, or anywhere in India, once the Chinese came in force.
Then Bean gave the order, and all his choppers rose up, cut the blades, and dropped as the jets came on and the blades folded back for the quick ride back to Sri Lanka.
Inside the chopper, Petra sat glumly in her straps. Virlomi was beside her, but they did not speak to each other.
"Petra," said Bean.
She did not look up.
"Virlomi found us, we did not find her. Because of her, we were able to come for you."
Petra still did not look up, but she reached out a hand and laid it on Virlomi's hands, which were clasped in her lap. "You were brave and good," said Petra. "Thank you for having compassion for me."
Then she looked up to meet Bean's gaze. "But I don't thank you, Bean. I was ready to kill him. I would have done it. I would have found a way."
"He's going to kill himself in the end," said Bean. "He's going to overreach himself, like Robespierre, like Stalin. Others will see his pattern and when they realize he's finally about to put them to the guillotine, they'll decide they've had enough and he will, most certainly, die."
"But how many will he kill along the way? And now your hands are stained with all their blood, because you loaded him onto that chopper alive. Mine, too."
"You're wrong," said Bean. "He is the only one responsible for his killings. And you're wrong about what would have happened if we had let him take you along. You would not have lived through that ride."
"You don't know that."
"I know Achilles. When that chopper rose to about twenty stories up, you would have been pushed out the door. And do you know why?"
"So you could watch," she said.
"No, he would have waited till I was gone," said Bean. "He's not stupid. He regards his own survival as far more important than your death."
"Then why would he kill me now? Why are you so sure?"
"Because he had his arm around you like a lover," said Bean. "Standing there with the gun to your head, he held you with affection. I think he meant to kiss you before he took you on board. He'd want me to see that."
"She would never let him kiss her," said Virlomi with disgust.
But Petra met Bean's gaze, and the tears in her eyes were a truer answer than Virlomi's brave words. She had already let Achilles kiss her. Just like Poke.
"He marked you," said Bean. "He loved you. You had power over him. After he didn't need you anymore as the hostage to keep me from killing him, you could not go on living."
Suriyawong shuddered. "What made him that way?"
"Nothing made him that way," said Bean. "No matter what terrible things happened in his life, no matter what dreadful hungers rose up from his soul, he chose to act on those desires, he chose to do the things he did. He's responsible for his own actions, and no one else. Not even those who saved his life."
"Like you and me today," said Petra.
"Sister Carlotta saved his life today," said Bean. "The last thing she asked me was to leave vengeance up to God."
"Do you believe in God?" asked Suriyawong, surprised.
"More and more," said Bean. "And less and less."
Virlomi took Petra's hands between hers and said, "Enough of blame and enough of Achilles. You're free of him. You can have whole minutes and hours and days in which you don't have to think of what he'll do to you if he hears what you say, and how you have to act when he might be watching. The only way he can hurt you now is if you keep watching him in your own heart."
"Listen to her, Petra," said Suriyawong. "She's a goddess, you know."
Virlomi laughed. "I save bridges and summon choppers."
"And you blessed me," said Suriyawong.
"I never did," said Virlomi.
"When you walked on my back," said Suriyawong. "My whole body is now the path of a goddess."
"Only the back part," said Virlomi. "You'll have to find someone else to bless the front."
While they bantered, half-drunk with success and liberty and the overwhelming tragedy they were leaving behind them, Bean watched Petra, saw the tears drop from her eyes onto her lap, longed to be able to reach out and touch them away from her eyes. But what good would that