“I’ve ignored it since I first laid eyes on you,” he admitted, lowering the glass and running his fingers over the condensation. “I’m fucking tired of ignoring it, but I can’t exactly take you with me when I go, can I?”
“Well,” I hemmed, excitement a growing army that couldn’t be defeated. “You could but—”
“Hendrix,” he said with a rough exhale. “I don’t even know how we’d begin to explain it to him.”
“Is there any point in saying anything?” I asked. “Not when you’re leaving. When you do, whatever this is, it ends.”
We stared then, the minutes ticking by as other customers coughed, laughed, and talked quietly around us.
Biting his lip, Everett stole my hand and watched his fingers trace the creases spanning my palm. “Do you really believe it’ll ever end?”
Our food arrived before I could answer, and I thanked Bev again, dragging my plate close.
We ate in silence, and being that I hadn’t eaten since the pizza Adela and I had ordered at her place the night before, I nearly demolished the whole lot.
“Whoa, Clover.” Everett let out a gentle laugh.
I withheld the belch that needed out and drank small sips of water as I watched him finish his food.
“So,” he said, pushing his plate away after scooping up the last mouthful of ice cream from it. “No one knows this. Not from around here anyway.”
I reached over the table, swiping the ice cream smeared over his top lip. He nipped at my thumb, then grabbed and sucked the remnants from it.
Liquid heat pooled in my full stomach, and I took my hand back, gesturing for him to continue.
Looking around the diner, he cleared his throat, then shifted in his seat. “I had a younger brother. He was eight when he died.” My heart dissolved into ash. “That’s why… the reason we moved here.”
“I’m sorry, Ever.” I blinked to keep my eyes clear, trying to accept what he’d said. “God. What happened?”
He shook his head. “Not ready to get into that. I don’t know if I ever will be, but my parents…” He sighed. “They were bad before, but at least they had jobs and tried to appear as functioning members of society. Even when they were half-tanked all the time.”
“Then they got worse,” I said, remembering what his mom had called me just last week.
He nodded, and sensing he was done talking about it, I took his hand in mine and held it.
Staring down at them, he sat so still. I wasn’t sure he was breathing until finally, his shoulders drooped a little. “Let’s get out of here, yeah?”
He tucked a twenty and a ten under our dirty plates, then held my hand until I was seated back in Dale’s car.
We took the long way home, choosing the backroads that gave way to breathtaking views of the ocean. But even that didn’t seem to remove the somberness from Everett’s expression.
I leaned over and clicked on the radio, searching until I registered the guitar riff from “Start Me Up” by The Rolling Stones.
Sure, I couldn’t sing to save my life, but I didn’t let that stop me. I wound down the window, belting out the chorus at the top of my lungs until finally, Everett quit laughing and joined in.
Long after we’d returned Dale’s car and walked back to my place, Everett was humming the same song while he held me, sprawled beneath me on my bed.
He didn’t try to make a move, and content to listen to the peaceful thud of his heart as he hummed, stirring the top of my hair, I didn’t either. My eyes drifted closed, my body relaxed, draped over the strong lines of his.
Sometime later, I woke alone to the sound of shouts and screams echoing down the hall into my cracked open bedroom door.
Bleary-eyed and wondering how Everett got out without anyone noticing, I forced myself up and made my way outside, adjusting my tank as I neared the front door and the commotion got louder.
It opened to the sound of a grunting, growling bus engine, and the sight of the guys climbing and jumping all over each other. “America, here we come!”
Confidence was fickle. It arrived when you least expected it and bailed when you most needed it.
I couldn’t rely on alcohol to see me through every transaction I was lucky enough to have with Everett.
So I’d ditched my classics and tales of young love, and ordered some romance novels online. Mom had a few in her room, but I’d already