Before (The Sensitives) - By Dawn Rae Miller Page 0,26
I recite, giving the same information I told the security detail that questioned us. “At first, a man seemed to be taunting us. But then Beck–”
When I say his name, he stands up. “I’m getting lunch. Do you want anything else?”
“I’m fine, thanks.”
“Kyra?” he asks, making an effort to be nice.
She pops another one of my grapes into her mouth. “Nope. I’m sharing with Lark.”
As soon as he’s gone, she leans across the table, so that her head is close to mine, and takes a deep breath. “Okay, so please don’t panic out.”
I hate when she starts sentences this way. “I won’t.”
She puts her head next to mine. “Maz and I..,” She pauses and I know what’s coming next before she says it.
My eyes grow wide. “Kyra! What if Bethina finds out? Or your parents—at your binding? You can’t have sex with him. You could end up in a different house—we’d barely ever see each other. And what if you develop feelings for him and he’s not chosen for you?”
I can’t take any more of this day. I just want it over. Between the Sensitives, Beck’s odd behavior, and Kyra trying her best to end up working a menial job for the rest of her life, I’m done.
Kyra sits back down in her seat. “I already have feelings for him, if you haven’t noticed.” For the first time ever, she actually seems embarrassed. Or maybe shy. I can’t tell exactly which because one second she’s smiling at me, and the next she’s avoiding my eyes.
“Besides, I’m not stupid. We didn’t do everything. Only almost everything.” She pushes on my chin to close my mouth. “Besides, how would anyone find out? They don’t have magical machines you have to walk through to see if you’re chaste.” She laughs, but I cringe at the use of the word ‘magical’. “Plus, I have it on good authority Maz is my mate.”
I gape at her. Again.
“How?” I demand—she doesn’t know anyone who works in Placement.
She puts her finger to her lips. “Can’t tell.”
If she believes Maz is her mate, no amount of arguing will change her mind. So I try another approach. “What if you’re caught?”
“What will they do? Yell at me? It’s not like they’ll have a public trial and send me off to live with the Sensitives. They don’t condemn people like us to hard labor.” She shrugs. “Besides, don’t you ever want to be with Beck so badly it hurts?” The tone of her voice has shifted from happy to accusatory.
I bite my lip. Beck’s back is toward me as he inches through the lunch line. This morning—it feels like years ago—when he stood over me, gazing into my eyes, I had hoped he’d kiss me. Not the chaste little kisses he’s been giving too freely lately, but something more.
But he didn’t. Because it’s wrong, and we both know it.
“No. I don’t want to compromise our future.” I give her a stern look. “And you shouldn’t either, Kyra. You’re going to end up with an awful assignment if you get caught. And you’ll definitely lose Maz. Your whole life will be ruined because you were impatient.”
She shakes her head, a smile on her lips.
“You said it yourself, Lina and Ryker are in so much trouble,” I insist.
She flicks out her wrists as if it’s no big deal. I huff. I wish Kyra would take things more seriously sometimes.
“Don’t you ever get bored with all this?” She uses her hands to dismissively sweep away the scene before us.
Kyra’s never content. She’s always doing little things to ‘make life more exciting’. Why can’t she be excited and happy with what she has?
“No. Things are going to change soon enough. After our bindings.” I stress the last sentence, hoping she gets my point.
Kyra watches Beck for a moment before speaking. “Maybe he’s not right for you. I mean, everyone else wants to break the rules and stuff. Maybe you guys aren’t compatible. It happens sometimes. Better to find out now, before you’re bound, and not have to go through the embarrassment of a public trial because he decided he likes someone else.”
Her words bore into my brain and stop me cold. Not compatible? That’s impossible. How can someone who makes me so happy not be my perfect mate? Besides, Bethina says Beck and I are two sides of a coin—stuck together with no way to pry us apart. We’re perfect for each other, which is why the State placed us together at such a