Seducing The Boss (Pulse #2) - Mari Carr Page 0,51
to understand Kellan’s aversion to the institution of marriage.
“My mom and I caught him in the act.”
He’d only been thirteen. Suddenly things were starting to make sense. Kellan had always idolized his dad as a boy. Whenever anyone remarked about how much he resembled or acted like his father, Kellan would grin as if he’d been handed a million dollars.
When Sara looked back, she realized that hero worship had started to wane in high school. She hadn’t really considered it until this moment and if she had, she probably would have just attributed it to puberty, to growing up.
“I’m sorry, Kellan. I didn’t know.”
He lifted one shoulder as if it didn’t matter, though he looked miserable. “No one did. Well, with the exception of the other woman and my parents’ marriage counselor.”
“So, he broke it off?”
Kellan nodded.
“And your mom forgave him?”
He scowled. “Of course she did. You know my mother. She loves everyone unconditionally.”
Kellan seemed to resent his mother’s innate kindness, which was weird. In the past, he’d always adored and spoken highly of her. Had he really been hiding all this bitterness for so many years?
“Are you angry at her for that?”
Kellan seemed taken aback by her question. “What? No, of course not. I just think…she didn’t deserve what he did to her. She forgave him too easily.”
“That’s what love is about, Kellan. No one is perfect. If you love someone, you accept the flaws and decide what your limits are. Your dad ended the affair, and he made amends. Clearly that was enough for your mom.”
Kellan didn’t respond.
“But I assume it wasn’t enough for you. Is that what you fought with your dad about?”
“Yeah. That was part of it.”
He clearly didn’t intend to elaborate on the rest. He was beginning to shut down. How the hell could she combat these feelings he’d been suppressing and holding on to for so long?
“So, your aversion to commitment stems from the fact your dad cheated on your mom?” She was struggling to connect the dots, to figure out his mindset.
“I’m not willing to make promises to a woman which I can’t keep.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means I’m not getting married. Ever.”
Sara began to understand. He’d spent a lifetime being told how much he was like his dad. Apparently those words had taken root and created a fear no one had seen. The worst part about it was that Kellan had more than his fair share of stubbornness. If he had truly made his mind up about this, it would take an act of God or Congress to change it. “You aren’t your dad, Kellan. No one says you’re going to make the same mistakes. Really, if anything, you can learn from them, not repeat them.”
His impassive face could have been chiseled in stone for all the emotion he revealed. “Go out with Gabriel, Sara. He can give you what you want, what you deserve. I can’t.”
“Can’t or won’t?” she challenged.
He rose from the table, sliding enough money to cover the bill and tip onto the table. “Same thing. I need to go check on my dad.”
Without another word, he left.
Sara remained at the table. She stared across the bar without seeing a damn thing, struck by the irony of how much her life had changed in the past week.
And how, regardless of everything that had happened, she was still sitting in the exact same spot.
Chapter Ten
Kellan stared at his empty glass, trying to find a way out of his funk. Almost a week had passed since he’d done the hardest thing he ever had to in his entire life and walked away from Sara. The next morning, he had gone to work to find an email from her. He had expected her to berate him for being such a miserable bastard. She would have been well within her rights to take him to task for leaving her alone at that table, but instead she’d merely let him out of his obligation to take her to charity gala. She said Gabriel had agreed to escort her.
Now he was at Score, trying to find a way back to normal. Unfortunately, nothing felt right without Sara. Things he’d done for years seemed off somehow. He couldn’t stand in his kitchen without picturing her bent over the table, or standing by the counter with a cup of coffee in her hands. He couldn’t grill a steak or soak in the hot tub or swim in his own damn pool without remembering how all those activities