my fault as yours.’ She raised her voice to be heard over a new group of bombers. ‘None of that matters now anyway They’re coming. They’re probably on their way already. That’s why I’m here.’
‘But, I—’.
‘You need to leave London, you need to do it now, and you mustn’t come back. They won’t stop looking for you. Not ever—’ There came a blast and the whole building shuddered; it was closer than the one before, and despite the room’s lack of windows an uncanny light flooded through every tiny pore in the building’s skin. Dolly’s eyes were wide with fear. The noise was relentless; the whistling as bombs fell, the blast when they landed, the anti-aircraft guns firing back; Vivien had to shout to be heard as she asked about Dolly’s family, her friends, whether there was anywhere at all that she could safely go. But Dolly didn’t answer. She shook her head and continued to cry helplessly, her palms pressed now to her face. Vivien remembered then what Jimmy had told her about Dolly’s family; it had warmed her to the other woman at the time, knowing that she, too, had suffered such a crippling loss.
The house rattled and shook; the plug just about leapt out of the horrid little sink, and Vivien felt her panic rise. ‘Think, Dolly,’ she implored, at the same time as a deafening explosion, ‘You have to think.’ There were more planes now, fighters as well as bombers, and the guns were chattering fiercely. Vivien’s head throbbed with the noise, and she imagined the bodies of the aircraft passing over the roof of the house; even with the ceiling and the attic above, she could all but see their whale-like bellies. ‘Dolly?’ she shouted.
Dolly’s eyes were closed and despite the clamour of bombs and guns, the roar of the planes, for a moment her face brightened, seeming almost peaceful, and then she lifted her head with a start and said, ‘I applied for a job a few weeks ago. It was Jimmy who found it …’ She took a sheet of paper from the small table beside her bed and handed it to Vivien.
Vivien scanned the letter, a job offer for Miss Dorothy Smitham at a boarding house called Sea Blue. ‘Yes,’ she said, ‘perfect. That’s where you must go.’
‘I don’t want to go by myself. We—’
‘Dolly—’
‘We were supposed to go together. It wasn’t meant to be like this, he was going to wait for me—’
And then she was crying again. For a split second, Vivien allowed herself to sink inside the other woman’s pain; it was so tempting just to let herself collapse, to give up and let go, to be submerged … but it didn’t do any good, she knew she had to be brave; Jimmy was already dead and Dolly would be too if she didn’t start listening. Henry would not waste too much time. His thugs would be on their way already. Gripped by urgency, she slapped the other woman’s cheek, not hard, but sharply. It worked, for Dolly swallowed her next sob, clutching her face and hiccuping. ‘Dolly Smitham,’ said Vivien sternly. ‘You need to leave London and you need to go quickly.’
Dolly was shaking her head. ‘I don’t think I can.’
‘I know you can. You’re a survivor.’
‘But Jimmy—’
‘That’s enough.’ She took Dolly by the chin and forced her gaze. ‘You loved Jimmy, I know that—’ I loved him too—‘and he loved you—my God, I know that. But you have to listen to me.’
Dolly gulped and nodded tearfully.
‘Go to the railway station tonight and buy yourself a ticket. You’re to—’. The light bulb flickered as another bomb landed close with a thundering crump; Dolly’s eyes widened, but Vivien stayed calm, refusing to let her go. ‘Get on that train and ride it all the way to the very end of the line. Don’t look back. Take the job, move again, live a good life.’
Dolly’s eyes as Vivien was speaking had changed; they’d focused, and Vivien could tell she was listening now; that she was hearing each and every word, and more than that, she was starting to understand.
‘You have to go. Seize the second chance, Dolly: think of it as an opportunity. After everything you’ve been through, after everything you’ve lost.’
‘I will,’ Dolly said quickly. ‘I’ll do it.’ She got up and pulled a small suitcase from beneath her bed; began filling it with clothing.
Vivien was so tired now; her own eyes had begun to water with utter exhaustion.