Searching For His Omega - Harper B. Cole Page 0,28

as if the facade he wore for work was left at the door, and he looked back at me and all I could think to do was to set my coffee down and open my arms.

He stepped right in and I held him close, not saying a word. We stayed like that, with him in my arms, just holding him close and wishing I could make things better for him. We’d been chatting, and I thought—I thought—I was an idiot not to see how much this was all weighing on him.

“I don’t know why you’re here.” He spoke against my chest, his body flush with mine, his scent surrounding me, making it feel like I was finally home.

“Because I need to be.” Even before he told me about the baby, I was longing to be back. Now that he had my child growing inside him, that need had grown unbearable. “I need to be a better dad than mine was. I need to be a better alpha for you than he was for my mom. I need to be here. I can’t explain it...but I just do.”

“It will be boring. I have to work.” He never moved from me. Gods, I loved the feel of him against me.

“I like being bored.” Not that he would believe me that I was bored given my growing erection pressed against him. His was equally attentive, so I didn’t feel so bad. Not that we would do anything about it. It wasn’t time for that. Maybe it never would be. That thought nearly crushed me. “It’s the best part of my off time.”

“This doesn’t mean...I don’t know what we are.” That made two of us. And there would be time for us to figure that out. We were connected together now for the rest of our lives. How that would look or work we’d figure out over time. Not tonight. Probably not even this visit.

“I don’t either, not to each other anyway, but I know that we will both be the most amazing fathers to our baby. We just need to figure out how it will all work.”

“I hope you’re right.” He held me just a bit tighter.

“I know we will be.” I kissed the top of his head. “Just the fact that we are worried we won’t be means we care more than so many parents out there.” And I hated that that was true. I hated that people didn’t see parenthood as the gift that it was.

We broke apart, and he showed me to the room I would be staying in as if we hadn’t just had a moment. And maybe that was for the best. I didn’t even know. But maybe I didn’t need to just yet. Maybe being here was enough. Gods, I needed it to be enough.

Nineteen

Stan

Where is he?

I was sitting in the waiting room of the imaging center. The appointment for my first scan was in five minutes. And Chet wasn’t here which didn’t help my anxiety level.

He had driven my car to the clinic which was in the same town as the pharmacy where I’d bought the pregnancy tests. The one where I couldn’t show my face. Or really my hair. They probably had a mugshot of me at the front with the words underneath, “If seen, do not approach.” My head was itchy just thinking about it.

He hadn’t bothered to rent a car as he could use mine during the day when I was at work. But after we parked outside the clinic and my palms were bathed in sweat, Chet asked, “Are you okay? Not nervous, are you?”

I lied. Not sure why. I’d been doing okay since going off my meds, but today I regretted it. “I’m fine. This is a piece of cake.”

“Great. I’ve got an errand to run. See you inside in ten minutes.”

“You’re leaving?” My slack-jawed look must have told him I wasn’t pleased.

“Not if you don’t want me to. It's not a big deal. I can do it another time.”

“No, go,” I fibbed. “I just need to pee. Badly.” Another lie.

“Okay.” He took me to the clinic door and then dashed off.

Why did I say I was fine? After examining my emotions, it was probably because I didn’t want Chet to think I should be back on the meds. I hoped to appear strong and capable. But by putting on a front, I’d lied and made myself feel worse. Shit!

As usual when I was nervous, one leg trembled and it knocked