girl, she’s a sensation. I can feel her without being close, but I can’t resist the urge. I’m powerless.
My head pounds, my cock aching, but it’s the pressure in my chest that pulses. I want to be inside her. I can barely see her in the darkness, but there’s a distance from the neighboring houses that casts a soft glow on her face. She’s watching me fuck her with my mouth, her eyes are hazy with pleasure, rocking her hips forward.
Her hands in my hair tighten. “Lincoln.”
That word, it shatters me. To see her let go, so passionate, so raw. She comes with my name on her lips, and I love the sound of it. My heart jackhammers in my chest. I clutch her thighs, because I want it. I want her.
Fuck this. Use her and leave.
Tiny breathy noises escape her, and they’re the sexiest fucking sounds I’ve heard in a long time. A twinge of desperation gnaws at me. I let go of her thighs, my fingerprints imprinted on her. I stand up and stare down at flushed cheeks and that heart-shaped face I want to forget. Her straight eyebrows, wet hair, and smudged mascara—she’s beautiful. I lean in, unaware of my movements or why I can’t pull away. Her lips curve into a smile. My dick pulses against the zipper of my jeans. I imagine her on her knees, peering up at me as my cock slides in and out of her mouth.
Fuck. Don’t think about that.
Her eyes squeeze shut as fog swallows the two of us. It rises from the ground like smoke, and I want to say something to her, but no words come. Her mouth twitches at my silence, and then she whispers, “That’s a hell of a payback.” She rights her T-shirt and pulls at the hem nervously.
Her sudden shyness makes my dick jump. Maybe I could be quick. Turn her around, fuck her against the house and leave. I don’t. I’m not sure why. I lift my eyebrow. I lean back. Her gaze flicks to mine, waiting on my words. I reach for my cigarettes, cautiously gauging her. “Enough that I can see you again?”
Jesus Christ. What the hell am I thinking? So much for using and leaving.
With our close proximity, emotions stir. Ones I buried long before her. I’m suffocating, longing for a breath that’s not filled with emptiness. I hate this feeling inside me. It makes me feel like I’ve been skinned alive, left bare to the world. I don’t like what I see, and she won’t either. Not when she finds out the reason why I’m here.
Her hand touches my chest. A wicked grin smears across her face while weariness takes mine. “I’ll think about it.” And then she leaves me standing in the dark with my cock raging and my mind racing. What the fuck has this chick done to me?
I stand there in silence, wondering how far I’ve gotten myself in this time.
Too far.
Pitch - Theoretical distance a propeller would travel in one revolution. Also, the rise and fall of a boat’s bow and stern.
I take my time walking to my dad’s house, the same path I took last night. Near the shoreline, white foam bubbles against silky black, miles of cold ocean are between me and a fucked-up reality. Water hits my feet, creeping in like this girl did to my head. I contemplate what it is I’m doing, and how this is going to end.
Badly.
I inhale the smells of wet sand and salty air, knowing I need to leave this town. If I stay— No, no, I can’t even think like that.
Atlas is still up and bouncing off the walls with excitement over school, the one I didn’t want him enrolled in here. Though I want to lash out at my dad for not paying attention to what I wanted, Atlas’s excitement puts the brakes on me reacting.
“Daddy!” And then he comes flying at me, his arms wrapping around my neck. “You’re here. I thought you left.”
I hold him close, my arms wrapped tight around his tiny body. He smells like cookies and dirt. “I’m heading out in the morning, buddy.”
Drawing back, he frowns, brooding eyes that mirror my own reflecting back at me. “How come I can’t go this time?”
I ruffle his hair. “Not this time. We’re gonna be out for a couple weeks.”
He frowns, but it’s short-lived. Nothing upsets this kid. He’s just like his mom was. Always happy, always willing to forgive easily.