looked at her, shock and dismay in his eyes. “I never realized that. Oh, babe. I’m so sorry.”
“We were at dinner, just the two of us, when he got the call. Dad always liked to take us out on our birthday eve. Just us. We would all do something together as a family on our actual birthday, but Dad would say it was his last chance to hang out with us before we turned a year older. He could be such a dork.”
She rested her cheek against his chest, listening to his heartbeat and remembering. “He got the call in the middle of dinner about a fire with possible juveniles inside. We were right there, just down the street. I begged him not to go, but he said he had to and he would be right back.”
A sob welled up at the memories flooding back. “I yelled at him as he was leaving and told him I hated that I never came first. He kissed the top of my head and said I always came first, that he loved me to the stars and back, but someone needed help, so he had to go. I wouldn’t say ‘I love you’ back. I was so mad at him for leaving. I didn’t tell him I loved him.”
She was unable to hold back the sob now or the one after it. Cooper’s arms tightened around her. “He knew, Liv. I never knew a man who loved his family as much as Steve Harper did.”
She knew it was true. He loved her. No matter what. He would have loved Natalie, too, and would have grieved if she had told him what had happened to her. He and Juliet would have told her over and over it wasn’t her fault and would have tried to persuade her to file charges against the boy who had attacked her.
Her father would never have been ashamed of Natalie. Neither would Juliet. They would have loved and supported her and tried to get her help. If only she had turned to them, instead of traveling through her pain alone. So much heartache could have been avoided.
Cooper held her for a long time, until all the tears were gone and she was left feeling an odd sense of relief. She had known there were things yet to learn about her father’s death. Discovering the truth didn’t ease the pain, but it did give her a new perspective, as well as compassion for Cooper, who had carried this alone all these years.
“Thank you for telling me the truth. I know you didn’t want to.”
“I didn’t want to cause you more pain. And, I guess selfishly, I didn’t want you to hate me for the part I played.”
“It wasn’t your fault, Cooper. None of it. You were trying to protect Natalie when you ran into that building, and you have been trying to protect her all these years by keeping the truth about her involvement to yourself.”
“I wish I could have helped her.”
“We all do.”
They stood wrapped together for a long time. She didn’t want to move because she knew that when she did, she was going to have to face the difficult truth that she was in love with Cooper and that she had been forever.
Sometime later, the mood between them shifted as the pain and sorrow began to recede, and she became aware of the heat of him against her, of his heart beating in time with hers.
She wasn’t sure if he moved first or if she did or if they moved at the same time so that his mouth slid over hers. This kiss was slow, sweet, filled with a tenderness that made her ache. She wrapped her arms around him, lost in the peace.
31
CAITLIN
“Are you sure you don’t want a ride home with us?” Ms. Clayton smiled. “I’ve got plenty of room for one more.”
Caitlin shook her head, as always, a little freaked out by the idea of Mimi being close friends with one of her teachers. Ms. Clayton taught her fourth-hour sophomore English. Her classes were fun and she somehow managed to make dry, dusty highbrow books interesting, but that didn’t mean Caitlin wanted her to be besties with her grandma.
“I’m good. I rode my bike down, so it’s easy enough for me to ride home.”
She looked around the rapidly emptying fire station. Where had Chief Vance gone? He had been there one minute; the next he had disappeared. Oddly, Olivia had disappeared as well.