mom?” I cry. Sobs choke me as tears spill down my cheeks. Roland sighs and moves toward me. The thought of backing away from him and running again has crossed my mind a million times in the last thirty seconds. When he pulls me into his arms, I lose it. I cry, the cries quickly turn into sobs, and just let him hold me.
“I’m sorry Mols. I don’t know what the hell you went through. I shouldn’t have said that to you.” His words sound sincere, but this man, the one holding me, is not the same man and sadly, I’m not the same woman.
“I tried so hard. All I wanted was for him to be happy,” I start to cry even harder. Roland tightens his arms around me.
“I know baby. I know.”
“Mom?” Drake’s voice causes me to pull away. He lets me go, but his face says he didn’t want to. I immediately miss the smell of him and the warmth of his arms around me.
“I’m okay. I’m sorry Drake. I didn’t mean to scare you,” I tell him as he walks around Roland and looks up at me.
“Did he hurt you? I told you I would get stronger and protect you mom,” Drake yells. Grabbing his arm Roland spins him around to face him. I’m about to step in, but I want to see if I fucked up by bringing him here.
“One thing you’re gonna learn about me is that I would never hurt your mom. You’re a kid, and that’s all you need to be. No one is gonna hurt her ever again. You get me?” His tone has calmed, but I can still see the fight in him. Drake swallows and looks up at his dad.
“I need to protect her. You weren’t there. You didn’t see what Tom did to her,” his shout fills the silence and when Roland gasps, I know he heard him. His eyes leap to mine.
“Tom? The same fuckin’ Tom? Tell me it isn’t him Molly. You didn’t fuckin’ live with him.” His hand releases Drake who quickly moves to my side.
“Don’t yell at her. You didn’t want us,” Drake yells.
“Drake stop it,” I warn him. Roland’s head cocks to the side as his eyes dance between both Drake and me.
“I didn’t?” he asks.
“You left us to be hurt. I’m a smart boy, I figured it out!” Drake’s voice gets even louder.
“Stop. Just stop it!”
“Just in case your mom didn’t tell you, I didn’t know about you kid, she ran from me. I didn’t leave her. She left me!” Roland hisses each word as if they were venom. Drake’s eyes jerk to mine and sadness fills his face.
“You said dad left us. That he didn’t want me,” his sad tone only rips my chest apart.
“You told him I didn’t want him?” Roland roars louder. The side door opens and slams closed again.
“Why don’t we calm down?” I look around Roland as the guy I know as Fin walks up to us. He bends down and looks Drake in the eye. “Why don’t you run inside and find Taz? I think she was wonderin’ what to make for dinner that you’d like,” he tells him.
Drake nods and starts to walk away, but not before giving me one last glance. My chest constricts as I watch my son walk away. Fin steps up next to me and tosses his arm over my shoulder.
“I think the kid has been through enough. Don’t you? You two fightin’ isn’t helpin’ shit,” Fin says. Roland is vibrating with anger. You can see it all over him, his eyes are black and his hands are clenched at his sides.
“She told my son I didn’t want him,” Roland growls.
“It was for his own protection,” I scream.
“You left me,” he roars.
“I was protecting you!” The words fall from my mouth in a fit of rage and anger. I didn’t mean to say them. Not out loud.
“What?” he asks. Fin’s arm falls from my shoulders as he moves off to the side to listen.
“Tom found us Roland. I was getting ready to come home and surprise you when he stopped me. I was planning to surprise you with a bunch of baby stuff. He caught on.” My voice catches in my throat. Roland stands there stunned by what I’m telling him, but I can’t stop now. I have to tell him everything.
“What the fuck?” he asks more to himself. Shaking his head, he runs his hand through his hair, and tugs.