I shake my head no and his eyes darken. He climbs off the bed and grabs my arm to yank me roughly up with him. He jerks me around in front of him and his hands stay planted on my shoulders. We look at each other’s reflection in the mirror.
“I see a beautiful woman. I see someone that’s smart enough to know what she needs to do. I get you’re scared. I understand not havin’ him is hard for you, but look at yourself Carnie. You’re not livin’ your life darlin’. You’re livin’ for him. That’s no way to live. Every day that you let him drag you down is another day that you lose what you could be. Look at you,” he says softly as tears stream down my cheeks.
I can’t do it. I can’t look, but when I don’t Viking reaches up and jerks my face roughly so that I don’t have any choice but to look.
“See who you are. You’re fuckin’ sexy as hell Carnie. Ugly? There isn’t a fuckin’ thing about you that I find ugly. Honestly? I think you could stand to gain a few more pounds and be sexy as fuck. Stop lettin’ some fuck tell you what you are. Find it yourself.”
With that his hand falls and he steps back leaving me to look at myself in the mirror. I know I need to make some changes in my life, but it’s so hard. When I turn Viking’s still standing there.
He’s watching me with heavy eyes.
“Viking?”
“Yeah darlin’?”
“Do you really think I’m pretty?”
The softness and doubt in my tone pisses me off. This weed in my system is making me feel weaker than I already am. The look in his eyes stirs something deep inside of me.
“I think you’re fuckin’ gorgeous,” he grumbles and steps up into my space. His hand comes to my chin and he lifts it so that I’m looking up at him. “If you were any other girl I’d fuck you so hard right now.” My breath catches in my throat. If I was any other girl?
“Why any other girl?”
“You’re Fin’s sister. You’re young. I’m not the kind of man that you need. There are so many reasons.”
His words are like a fist to the stomach. It nearly knocks the wind out of me. I start to step back as more tears start filling my eyes when I hear him growl, “Fuck.” His lips crash into mine. As rough a man as he is, his lips are so damn soft. Tasting him on my tongue I feel my knees weaken. I press my body closer to his needing to feel his warmth. I want him inside of me. I want him owning me. My head is a mess and I’m probably not thinking clearly, but fuck it.
Viking pulls back and lets his head rest against mine, “Fuck. I knew those lips were gonna be sweet, but goddamn Carn.” His admission makes me smile. No one has ever said anything like that to me before. Not even Eric was this sweet.
“I should go,” I whisper.
He nods his head, but doesn’t release my face which is still cupped in his hands.
“I need another taste first,” he mumbles before moving back in.
His lips move slower this time as if he’s trying to savor the taste of me. I let him. Slowly his lips leave mine and move down my jaw and against my neck. A moan escapes my lips as I tilt my head to give him better access. The feel of his tongue against my skin is igniting a flame inside of me.
“We should stop.” His voice betrays his words. His actions are even worse. His lips are still trailing a line over my neck.
“Viking?”
His name is a whisper from my lips as I let my arms come up to wrap around his neck. My nails scrape along the nape of his neck before I tangle them in his long, silken hair. I tug it softly. I’m rewarded with a groan. I can feel his hard on pressing against me.
“Fuck this is a bad idea Carnie. I can’t do this.”
He holds my face in his hands and pulls his lips from my skin. He stares into my eyes and I can see pure lust painting his features. His eyes are hooded and dark. There’s no doubt they match mine.
“I’m sorry. I… I’ll go.”
I try to push away from him as fresh tears start falling down my