Say Hello, Kiss Goodbye - Jacquelyn Middleton Page 0,164
contract…” The sobering words tumbled from his lips, collapsing his happy-go-lucky smile, stealing his effervescence. “You’re leaving.”
A sob dislodged from deep inside Leia’s chest. “I don’t want to! But I can’t back out. Shantelle is homesick and heartbroken, couldn’t stop crying. She feels awful about…” Leia stammered, tears clouding her eyes. “She apologized like twenty times.”
“Oh, Leia! Come here.” Despair quivered Tarquin’s voice as he gathered her in, kissing her forehead, her hair, her damp cheeks, as if committing Leia to memory. “We’ll think of something, okay?” He squeezed her tight then cleared his throat like he was trying not to cry. “Uh, what about…maybe you could go just for award season and Fashion Week? Then come straight back.”
I wish. “It’s a bit more complicated than that.” Leia shuddered, her fingers skimming along one of his silk lapels. “Shan called her agent this afternoon, and he said the studio wants me to style her, plus two co-stars from her next film—all in Frill-Seekers.” She eased back from his chest and looked into his eyes. “One of them is Victoria Angel.”
Tarquin’s mouth fell open. “Bloody hell! She won an Oscar this year!”
“I know! The other actress, Charlotte, was just nominated for a Golden Globe. And all three of them need a permanent stylist on call for most of next year.”
Tarquin ran his fingers over his lips, the corners twitching then rising into a smile. “That’s amazing, Leia! Oh my god, talk about a ‘big break’. This is everything you’ve been working towards.”
So why does all this feel like a nightmare? She buried her face in his neck. “I’d have given up everything for this a year ago, but it doesn’t come close to being with you. We’ve been making plans, putting down roots. Now, that life is up in the air until god knows when.” Tears toppled down her cheeks and fell onto his silk bow tie, dappling the fabric. “I feel like that Italian soldier on Orkney, leaving his heart behind.”
“Aw, my beautiful girl.” He tucked a wisp of her hair behind her ear. “You’re not leaving it behind. You’re leaving it with me for safekeeping. I’ll fly out, come see you. You know I’d travel to the ends of the earth if it meant spending five minutes with you.”
He’s not getting it. She lifted her head and wiped her eyes. “Tarquin, we’ve talked about this. You know I can’t do long-distance.”
“But it would be different with me. You’re my priority, and everything else comes second.”
“I know and I love you for that, but it’s never that easy—living in different places, separated by five time zones and an ocean. It takes its toll, the loneliness, the anxiety…”
Tarquin paused, lost in thought, the muscle in his jaw tensing. “Yeah.” He let out a staggered breath. “Yeah, I can see that. And to be honest, distance played a huge role in my parents’ split. It’s hard to build a life with someone who’s never there.”
Her face crumpled. “And I won’t ask you to wait for me.”
“You know I would, though, right?”
“You can’t, Tarquin. It’s not fair to you. I’d feel so guilty, making you put your life on hold for something that might never happen. So much can change in a year. Look at the last twelve months we’ve been through already.” The park blurred as she held him tight. “But at the same time, I know I’d die if you fell in love with someone else. I want to be the one you kiss before you fall asleep.”
“Oh, Leia. I want that, too.” Tarquin let out a mournful sigh. “So. What are we gonna do?” He leaned his head against hers and sniffed, pausing for a moment. “I guess there’s only one thing for it.”
We’re breaking up. Tears poured down Leia’s cheeks, her whole body aching and reeling, feeling like it was buckling in on itself. THIS is why I can’t fall in love. It decimates me, every time. It turns my heart to dust. She nuzzled into his neck, dreading the moment they’d kiss goodbye and forever part, walking away from what might have been.
Tarquin’s breath flirted with her hair. “I’m coming with you,” he whispered.
WHAT?! How? Breaths stuttered in Leia’s chest. She pulled back, blinking in disbelief. “But your life…it’s here.”
A tender smile curved his lips as he stroked her waist. “No. It’s wherever you are.”
He says that, but the seams just don’t line up. “But…what about your business? Tarquin, you can’t bring London with you.”