To Save a Love - Alexa Aston Page 0,35

all. He was the one who had put her in the bad place with Fiend. She had spent hours when she first arrived at Gollingham thinking of ways to kill him. Stab him. Shoot him. Push him off a cliff or the roof of their London townhouse. Cut him with a thousand slices until his blood flowed freely and the life drained from his eyes.

She had pushed those kind of thoughts aside. In her world, everything was perfect and so she had stopped thinking of Papa at all. Her world had beautiful colors. The house had furniture that she designed in her mind and she often moved it around, finding new ways to please her. Every room had freshly-cut flowers in crystal vases, flowers of every color of the rainbow and beyond. She and Jessa took their tea on beautiful china plates, where each time they sat, Anna varied the pattern and colors.

Her bedchamber received the most light and had the largest bed she had ever seen. The adjoining room was filled with nothing but exquisite gowns. She spent hours trying them on, sometimes with Jessa watching her, nodding her approval and clapping her hands when one especially delighted her. Anna had worn every type of fashion under the sun. She had even imagined times when she donned the clothes of a man. She had done so once when she was about twelve, taking a pair of trousers that Dez had brought her, and slipping out of the house to ride in them. It was ever so nice to be able to move and walk and ride in something so comfortable.

The stables were perhaps her favorite part of the world she created. More than anything, she had loved to ride and felt more comfortable in the saddle than anywhere else. Her stables had horses of every color and size. Her favorites were a tall black of seventeen hands who was a handful, spirited and energetic, and a chestnut mare with white socks who had the gentlest nature and enjoyed the apples Anna brought to her.

A good portion of her time was spent riding. She rode the perimeter of Shelton Park and cut through the woods in order to take the shortcut to Torville Manor. When she went there, Dez and Dalinda were always waiting for her. They would mount their horses and the three of them would ride out. They explored places she remembered and new ones she invented on the spot. They rode into the small village and would stop at the baker’s for a treat. Sometimes a cinnamon bun. Sometimes fresh scones.

She rode back now, the sun shining because it was always a sunny, rain-free day in her world. She led her horse into the stables and returned to the house. Magically, she stepped inside wearing a sapphire blue gown and went to the drawing room, where Jessa should be waiting for her and they would have tea.

Her sister wasn’t there, though. Dez waited for her instead. And she kept hearing the buzzing. Then it stopped and she relaxed, content to pour out the tea and tell Dez about the carrot cake she had made that he was about to eat.

Then she heard crying. No, she didn’t hear it. She sensed it. The tears flowed. She instinctively knew this—but no sobs came.

Who might be crying?

No one cried in her world. No one was ever sad or unhappy or jealous or angry. Everyone was happy and satisfied and enjoyed every minute.

Slowly, she opened her eyes.

Glancing around, she didn’t know where she was though it seemed incredibly familiar. She felt warm and smelled sandalwood again.

Dez . . .

Anna decided she had taken her world to a new level but realized she no longer had control of the creation of it. She was somewhere she didn’t know. She smelled someone she would never see again.

For some reason, she had avoided looking at the person who held her but she couldn’t avoid doing so any longer. Her gaze turned to whoever held her. Her breath caught.

It was Dez. A much older Dez than the boy or young man she remembered. This Dez was very much a man. His face was tanned as if he spent a good portion of his day outside in the elements. His thick hair, always with that slight wave, was a rich brown. She steeled herself and looked into his eyes. Oh, they were exactly the same, a deep brown with amber circling them.

And Dez was the one