Don’t look, Brex. Don’t give him the satisfaction.
With every step, the need grew stronger, the sense of his presence right next to me. My eyes watered as I resisted, swimming upstream against the current. Finally making it to my table, I sat across from Tad, purposely putting my back to the enigmatic man across the room. Was it completely my imagination, or was he stalking me without even moving? I had no idea what piqued his interest, if it was anything besides boredom, but I couldn’t deny an acute awareness of him, like a ghost rubbing up against me. The impression of him right next to me.
Tad snorted into his coffee cup, shaking his head.
“What?” I grumbled.
“A simple pebble can cause a tsunami.”
“Are you taking your meds, old man?” I shoveled the oatmeal into my mouth, not even letting it settle on my tongue before swallowing. “And why aren’t you sharing them?”
“You,” he said, setting down his cup with a clink next to his toast, “weren’t supposed to get on the list.”
“Like I asked to be.” I stabbed my spoon into the watery oats, sourness filling my stomach at the truth. I was going to die soon. And from what I’d seen at the Blooding…in a very painful, horrific way.
“Is there any way to get off it? Scrubbing toilets? Good behavior?”
“No.” Tad tapped his fingers against the mug. “Once you’re on it, it’s final.”
And final meant final.
“How many come before me? I mean, I have a while. Lots of people are on the list before me, right?” I gestured around, trying to swallow, fear closing in my throat.
“They go to a lottery system when they run out of marked people, which would have happened tonight for the Blooding tomorrow,” Tad spoke softly, making every word feel like a boulder. “Rodriguez killed the last one on the list.”
My nose sucked in a violent swig of air. “Which means?”
“You just got bumped to the top,” he replied. “You will fight tomorrow night.”
He said fight, but I knew what he actually meant.
You will die tomorrow night.
Chapter 18
The vibration of stomping feet, the blistering chants, and screams of the crowd raked down my nerves, squeezing my lungs in a death grip. The sharp smell of blood, sweat, urine, excitement, and utter terror lashed up my nose and coated my tongue.
“Fight! Fight!” The death chant echoed through the dark tunnel I was in, pounding against the sound of my heartbeat. Peering down, I watched my chest heaving for air as though my heart wanted to break through my ribs and save itself.
“It’s time, 85221.” A guard walked past me, heading to the locked gate where I waited.
Terror I couldn’t even fathom rattled my bones, separating me from my body, protecting me from fully understanding the truth. I wasn’t even aware of how violently I was shaking until I peered down at my figure. My muscles twitched and rattled as if they pulled me out of ice while sweat pooled in my palms and down my back, ripping all the moisture from my mouth.
“They’ll have someone more your level for the first fight,” Opie had told me the night before. Somehow knowing I would not be able to sleep, he and Bitzy sat with me all night, keeping me company.
“The human man Rodriguez killed wasn’t his level,” I quipped.
“Trying to make you feel better, fishy. Stop ruining my ‘this could be worse, brighter side’ crap.” He stomped his foot.
Chirp! Bitzy snarled at me, flipping her finger.
“Fine. Sorry.” I motioned to him. “Go on.”
“Thank you.” He dipped his head theatrically, cleared his throat, then paused, screwing his face into a frown. “Yeah, I got nothing. You’re screwed.”
Laughter burst out of me. I needed a break from the fear and tension, and Opie and Bitzy’s company helped me through the night without losing my mind, even letting me drift off for a moment.
That small comfort felt at least centuries ago now.
The pounding of feet in the stands drumming along with my pulse brought the harsh reality of what was going to happen to me. And how my death would have them cheering and clapping, then they wake up tomorrow and go on, just the same as usual. Nothing different to them.
Were these my final moments? Was this how my story ended? It seemed cruel and unnecessary that I lived through all of what I did just to die this way.
The healer’s words returned to me with painful accuracy. “Human, you will wish I let